Cover of All Fours
    Fiction

    All Fours

    by July;, Miranda
    Miranda July’s 2024 novel All Fours follows a 45-year-old semi-famous artist who disrupts her stable Los Angeles life with her husband and child by impulsively announcing a cross-country road trip. The journey becomes a catalyst for self-discovery as she grapples with midlife crises, sexual awakening, and perimenopause, culminating in an unexpected affair. Blending humor and poignancy, the novel explores themes of desire, identity, and the search for reinvention in middle age. July’s autofictional style and candid portrayal of female experience have drawn comparisons to a “perimenopause novel,” marking it as a distinctive entry in contemporary literature.

    In Chap­ter 3, the pro­tag­o­nist and her friend Jor­di share a can­did con­ver­sa­tion over milk­shakes, reveal­ing inti­mate details about their sex lives. The pro­tag­o­nist admits to using fan­tasies involv­ing taboo sce­nar­ios, such as step­fa­ther-step­daugh­ter dynam­ics, to main­tain her mar­i­tal sex life, which she approach­es mechan­i­cal­ly, like exer­cise. Jor­di, in con­trast, describes a more spon­ta­neous and phys­i­cal­ly root­ed approach with her part­ner, empha­siz­ing raw, unfil­tered inti­ma­cy. Their dis­cus­sion high­lights their dif­fer­ing atti­tudes toward sex—one cere­bral and per­for­ma­tive, the oth­er instinc­tu­al and unre­strained.

    The con­ver­sa­tion takes a humor­ous yet reveal­ing turn as they com­pare their expe­ri­ences. The pro­tag­o­nist ini­ti­ates sex week­ly to pre­empt her husband’s expec­ta­tions, while Jor­di express­es envy at the fre­quen­cy, lament­ing her own less fre­quent encoun­ters. The protagonist’s admis­sion of rely­ing on elab­o­rate men­tal fan­tasies under­scores her detach­ment dur­ing sex, where­as Jordi’s descrip­tions of sleepy, pri­mal encoun­ters with her part­ner empha­size a deep­er phys­i­cal con­nec­tion. This con­trast leaves the pro­tag­o­nist feel­ing inad­e­quate, as if she’s “lost at life.”

    Jordi’s vivid por­tray­al of her sex life—messy, ani­mal­is­tic, and deeply connected—stuns the pro­tag­o­nist, who real­izes her own expe­ri­ences lack the same authen­tic­i­ty. The chapter’s tone shifts as the pro­tag­o­nist grap­ples with this rev­e­la­tion, feel­ing both envi­ous and intro­spec­tive. Their meet­ing ends with Jor­di offer­ing reas­sur­ance about the protagonist’s upcom­ing trip, sug­gest­ing that trans­for­ma­tion isn’t oblig­a­tory, a com­ment that lingers in the protagonist’s mind.

    The chap­ter clos­es with the pro­tag­o­nist return­ing home stealth­ily, mir­ror­ing her ear­li­er sense of dis­con­nec­tion. The con­ver­sa­tion with Jor­di serves as a cat­a­lyst for self-reflec­tion, expos­ing the protagonist’s dis­sat­is­fac­tion with her per­for­ma­tive approach to inti­ma­cy. The con­trast between their sex­u­al dynam­ics under­scores broad­er themes of authen­tic­i­ty, desire, and the ten­sion between soci­etal expec­ta­tions and per­son­al ful­fill­ment. The chap­ter leaves the pro­tag­o­nist ques­tion­ing whether she’s over­com­pli­cat­ing her life and rela­tion­ships.

    FAQs

    • 1. How do the narrator and Jordi maintain their friendship’s unique dynamic through their weekly meetings?

      Answer:
      The narrator and Jordi maintain their friendship through weekly meetings where they indulge in nostalgic junk food (milkshakes and childhood desserts) while otherwise adhering to health-conscious diets. This ritual represents their shared commitment to avoiding rigidity in life choices. The chapter reveals this is part of a larger agreement to “maintain fluidity in diet and all things,” contrasting with their public personas. These private meetings also serve as a safe space for intimate conversations they keep hidden from their partners, such as discussing sexual fantasies and marital dynamics (pages 19-20).

      2. Compare and contrast the narrator’s and Jordi’s approaches to sexuality within their marriages.

      Answer:
      The narrator approaches sex as a performative obligation (“like exercise”), initiating weekly encounters to preempt spousal pressure while mentally escaping into elaborate fantasies involving power dynamics and infidelity scenarios. In contrast, Jordi describes a primal, body-centered sexuality that occurs spontaneously (even during sleep) with raw physicality and minimal artifice. While the narrator’s experience is mind-rooted with “a screen clamped in front of my face,” Jordi’s is characterized by present-moment immersion (“Body feel good. Me want”). Both women initiate sex, but their motivations differ fundamentally—Jordi from genuine desire, the narrator from perceived duty (pages 20-22).

      3. What symbolic significance does Jordi’s artwork hold in relation to the chapter’s themes?

      Answer:
      Jordi’s sculptures—described as “her own body but morphed, ghoulishly skewed toward animals, cars, monsters, always headless”—symbolize the chapter’s exploration of identity transformation and bodily existence. The distorted, headless forms mirror the narrator’s psychological disconnection during sex (prioritizing fantasy over physicality) while reflecting Jordi’s embodied approach to life. The materials (wood, limestone, plaster) suggest both permanence and malleability, paralleling the friends’ discussion about whether personal transformation is necessary or possible. The artwork’s presence during their intimate conversation creates a visual metaphor for their contrasting relationships with physicality (page 21).

      4. Analyze how the narrator’s reaction to Jordi’s sexual description reveals her underlying insecurities.

      Answer:
      When Jordi describes her uninhibited, animalistic sex life with her partner, the narrator feels “bludgeoned by this vision of intimacy” and concludes she’s “lost at life.” This extreme reaction exposes her deep-seated insecurity about her own marriage’s emotional authenticity. While she initially took pride in her elaborate sexual performances (“I was pleased she felt this way”), Jordi’s account of genuine connection—with its “ugly” positions and sleepy vulnerability—forces her to confront the transactional nature of her own sex life. The contrast highlights her awareness that she prioritizes fantasy over authentic connection, which ties into her broader anxieties about personal transformation (pages 21-22).

      5. How does Jordi’s final advice about flying versus driving reflect the chapter’s central conflict?

      Answer:
      Jordi’s suggestion that the narrator “can just fly if you want” serves as a metaphor for the chapter’s exploration of self-imposed challenges versus accepting one’s nature. When she clarifies she’s not predicting failure but acknowledging that transformation isn’t mandatory (“if you don’t transform… that’s fine too”), she challenges the narrator’s assumption that personal growth requires struggle. This mirrors their earlier conversation about sexuality—Jordi embraces instinctual ease while the narrator constructs elaborate mental frameworks. The advice underscores the tension between striving for change and self-acceptance that permeates their friendship dynamic (page 22).

    Quotes

    • 1. “This was part of a larger agreement to never become rigid, to maintain fluidity in diet and all things.”

      This quote captures the protagonists’ philosophy of resisting strict routines, even as they navigate adulthood’s pressures. It introduces a key theme of the chapter—the tension between personal freedom and societal/relationship expectations.

      2. “Sometimes I could hear Harris’s dick whistling impatiently like a teakettle, at higher and higher pitches until I finally couldn’t take it and so I initiated.”

      A darkly humorous yet revealing metaphor about marital sexual dynamics. The quote illustrates the protagonist’s sense of obligation in her marriage and the performative nature of intimacy, contrasting with Jordi’s more organic approach.

      3. “I’m completely inside the movie in my head. It’s like I have a screen clamped in front of my face.”

      This confession about sexual fantasy highlights the protagonist’s disconnect between physical intimacy and mental experience. It underscores the “mind-rooted” versus “body-rooted” dichotomy explored throughout the conversation.

      4. “I was quiet now, bludgeoned by this vision of intimacy. It wasn’t a matter of having lost at this conversation; I had lost at life.”

      A pivotal moment where the protagonist realizes her envy of Jordi’s raw, unselfconscious sexuality. The quote marks a turning point in self-awareness about her own constrained approach to relationships and pleasure.

      5. “I’m just making it harder for myself, aren’t I?”

      The chapter’s closing revelation, where the protagonist begins to acknowledge her self-imposed barriers to fulfillment. This simple question encapsulates the chapter’s exploration of personal growth and transformation.

    Quotes

    1. “This was part of a larger agreement to never become rigid, to maintain fluidity in diet and all things.”

    This quote captures the protagonists’ philosophy of resisting strict routines, even as they navigate adulthood’s pressures. It introduces a key theme of the chapter—the tension between personal freedom and societal/relationship expectations.

    2. “Sometimes I could hear Harris’s dick whistling impatiently like a teakettle, at higher and higher pitches until I finally couldn’t take it and so I initiated.”

    A darkly humorous yet revealing metaphor about marital sexual dynamics. The quote illustrates the protagonist’s sense of obligation in her marriage and the performative nature of intimacy, contrasting with Jordi’s more organic approach.

    3. “I’m completely inside the movie in my head. It’s like I have a screen clamped in front of my face.”

    This confession about sexual fantasy highlights the protagonist’s disconnect between physical intimacy and mental experience. It underscores the “mind-rooted” versus “body-rooted” dichotomy explored throughout the conversation.

    4. “I was quiet now, bludgeoned by this vision of intimacy. It wasn’t a matter of having lost at this conversation; I had lost at life.”

    A pivotal moment where the protagonist realizes her envy of Jordi’s raw, unselfconscious sexuality. The quote marks a turning point in self-awareness about her own constrained approach to relationships and pleasure.

    5. “I’m just making it harder for myself, aren’t I?”

    The chapter’s closing revelation, where the protagonist begins to acknowledge her self-imposed barriers to fulfillment. This simple question encapsulates the chapter’s exploration of personal growth and transformation.

    FAQs

    1. How do the narrator and Jordi maintain their friendship’s unique dynamic through their weekly meetings?

    Answer:
    The narrator and Jordi maintain their friendship through weekly meetings where they indulge in nostalgic junk food (milkshakes and childhood desserts) while otherwise adhering to health-conscious diets. This ritual represents their shared commitment to avoiding rigidity in life choices. The chapter reveals this is part of a larger agreement to “maintain fluidity in diet and all things,” contrasting with their public personas. These private meetings also serve as a safe space for intimate conversations they keep hidden from their partners, such as discussing sexual fantasies and marital dynamics (pages 19-20).

    2. Compare and contrast the narrator’s and Jordi’s approaches to sexuality within their marriages.

    Answer:
    The narrator approaches sex as a performative obligation (“like exercise”), initiating weekly encounters to preempt spousal pressure while mentally escaping into elaborate fantasies involving power dynamics and infidelity scenarios. In contrast, Jordi describes a primal, body-centered sexuality that occurs spontaneously (even during sleep) with raw physicality and minimal artifice. While the narrator’s experience is mind-rooted with “a screen clamped in front of my face,” Jordi’s is characterized by present-moment immersion (“Body feel good. Me want”). Both women initiate sex, but their motivations differ fundamentally—Jordi from genuine desire, the narrator from perceived duty (pages 20-22).

    3. What symbolic significance does Jordi’s artwork hold in relation to the chapter’s themes?

    Answer:
    Jordi’s sculptures—described as “her own body but morphed, ghoulishly skewed toward animals, cars, monsters, always headless”—symbolize the chapter’s exploration of identity transformation and bodily existence. The distorted, headless forms mirror the narrator’s psychological disconnection during sex (prioritizing fantasy over physicality) while reflecting Jordi’s embodied approach to life. The materials (wood, limestone, plaster) suggest both permanence and malleability, paralleling the friends’ discussion about whether personal transformation is necessary or possible. The artwork’s presence during their intimate conversation creates a visual metaphor for their contrasting relationships with physicality (page 21).

    4. Analyze how the narrator’s reaction to Jordi’s sexual description reveals her underlying insecurities.

    Answer:
    When Jordi describes her uninhibited, animalistic sex life with her partner, the narrator feels “bludgeoned by this vision of intimacy” and concludes she’s “lost at life.” This extreme reaction exposes her deep-seated insecurity about her own marriage’s emotional authenticity. While she initially took pride in her elaborate sexual performances (“I was pleased she felt this way”), Jordi’s account of genuine connection—with its “ugly” positions and sleepy vulnerability—forces her to confront the transactional nature of her own sex life. The contrast highlights her awareness that she prioritizes fantasy over authentic connection, which ties into her broader anxieties about personal transformation (pages 21-22).

    5. How does Jordi’s final advice about flying versus driving reflect the chapter’s central conflict?

    Answer:
    Jordi’s suggestion that the narrator “can just fly if you want” serves as a metaphor for the chapter’s exploration of self-imposed challenges versus accepting one’s nature. When she clarifies she’s not predicting failure but acknowledging that transformation isn’t mandatory (“if you don’t transform… that’s fine too”), she challenges the narrator’s assumption that personal growth requires struggle. This mirrors their earlier conversation about sexuality—Jordi embraces instinctual ease while the narrator constructs elaborate mental frameworks. The advice underscores the tension between striving for change and self-acceptance that permeates their friendship dynamic (page 22).

    Note