Cover of All Fours
    Fiction

    All Fours

    by July;, Miranda
    Miranda July’s 2024 novel All Fours follows a 45-year-old semi-famous artist who disrupts her stable Los Angeles life with her husband and child by impulsively announcing a cross-country road trip. The journey becomes a catalyst for self-discovery as she grapples with midlife crises, sexual awakening, and perimenopause, culminating in an unexpected affair. Blending humor and poignancy, the novel explores themes of desire, identity, and the search for reinvention in middle age. July’s autofictional style and candid portrayal of female experience have drawn comparisons to a “perimenopause novel,” marking it as a distinctive entry in contemporary literature.

    The chap­ter opens with a break­fast con­ver­sa­tion where Sam men­tions a gym­nas­tics class­mate shar­ing the name of Papa’s best friend, prompt­ing the nar­ra­tor to real­ize it’s time to explain their uncon­ven­tion­al fam­i­ly struc­ture to their child. The cou­ple metic­u­lous­ly pre­pares a script to nav­i­gate this del­i­cate con­ver­sa­tion, aim­ing to bal­ance hon­esty with reas­sur­ance. Their dia­logue reveals under­ly­ing anx­i­eties about phras­ing and the poten­tial long-term impli­ca­tions of their words, reflect­ing both their care and the com­plex­i­ty of redefin­ing famil­ial rela­tion­ships post-romance. The scene under­scores the ten­sion between plan­ning for emo­tion­al clar­i­ty and the unpre­dictabil­i­ty of such vul­ner­a­ble moments.

    Dur­ing the prepa­ra­tion, the cou­ple grap­ples with exis­ten­tial ques­tions about their future, includ­ing the pos­si­bil­i­ty of divorce. The nar­ra­tor reflects on how the con­cept of divorce has shift­ed from feel­ing emo­tion­al­ly charged to a mun­dane admin­is­tra­tive process. Their col­lab­o­ra­tive effort to mem­o­rize and refine the script high­lights their shared com­mit­ment to trans­paren­cy while expos­ing their fears of fail­ure. The mun­dane yet poignant details—like using a Pop­si­cle as a cue—add lev­i­ty to the weighty emo­tion­al labor of rene­go­ti­at­ing fam­i­ly dynam­ics in a way their child can under­stand.

    A par­al­lel nar­ra­tive fol­lows the narrator’s vis­it to Dr. Men­doza, where she con­fronts anx­i­eties about per­i­menopause and aging. The doc­tor reframes “freak­ing out” as a nat­ur­al part of tran­si­tions, com­par­ing it to the trau­ma of birth that pre­pares a baby for life. This metaphor res­onates with the nar­ra­tor, who begins to view her emo­tion­al tur­moil as a nec­es­sary step toward a new phase. The clin­i­cal set­ting con­trasts with the inti­ma­cy of the fam­i­ly con­ver­sa­tion, yet both sce­nar­ios explore themes of change, accep­tance, and the search for sta­bil­i­ty amid upheaval.

    The chap­ter con­cludes with the nar­ra­tor seek­ing pos­i­tive per­spec­tives on menopause by tex­ting old­er women. Their responses—ranging from phys­i­cal relief to new­found free­dom and self-discovery—challenge her ear­li­er fears. The rapid, var­ied replies paint a nuanced pic­ture of post-repro­duc­tive life, empha­siz­ing empow­er­ment rather than decline. This col­lec­tive wis­dom, jux­ta­posed with the ear­li­er famil­ial and med­ical anx­i­eties, weaves togeth­er the chapter’s cen­tral theme: trans­for­ma­tion, whether in rela­tion­ships or the body, demands vul­ner­a­bil­i­ty but can lead to unex­pect­ed lib­er­a­tion.

    FAQs

    • 1. How do the parents prepare to explain their “nonconforming family” structure to their child, and what concerns do they have about this conversation?

      Answer:
      The parents carefully prepare a script in a shared Google doc to explain their transition from a romantic relationship to a deep friendship while maintaining their family unit. They worry about phrasing things awkwardly (“being romantic together” sounds potentially creepy) or saying something disturbing. Harris expresses concern about future divorce making their current explanation seem fraudulent, though both agree this is unlikely soon. The mother rehearses the speech extensively, even accidentally dropping the script at a doctor’s office, showing both their meticulous preparation and underlying anxiety about conveying this complex family dynamic appropriately to their child.

      2. What significant revelation does Dr. Mendoza share about postmenopausal mental health, and how does this contrast with the narrator’s previous understanding?

      Answer:
      Dr. Mendoza reveals that women’s mental health postmenopause is typically better than at any other life stage except possibly childhood, due to stabilizing hormones and no longer cycling between estrogen/progesterone. This starkly contrasts with the narrator’s earlier fearful perception shaped by her friend Mary’s negative experiences. The doctor frames this as both biological (hormonal stability) and sociological (escaping patriarchal constraints on reproductive-age bodies). This prompts the narrator to actively seek positive menopausal experiences from other women, shifting her perspective from dread to curiosity about this life phase.

      3. Analyze how the chapter uses medical examinations as a metaphor for life transitions.

      Answer:
      The gynecological exam becomes an extended metaphor for life transitions - the “cold metal beak” intrusion mirroring the discomfort of change, while Dr. Mendoza’s explanation of birth trauma (“vaginal canal squeezing water from lungs”) parallels how difficult transitions prepare us for new phases. The narrator moves from passive patient (“casting myself as a passive child around doctors”) to actively inquiring about postmenopausal life, symbolizing her growing agency. Even the dropped script during the exam represents vulnerability in transition. The clinical setting underscores how bodily and existential transitions are intertwined, with medical authority both guiding and contrasting with personal revelation.

      4. How does the narrator’s open-sourcing experiment with older women reshape the chapter’s thematic exploration of menopause?

      Answer:
      The spontaneous text survey provides diverse, overwhelmingly positive perspectives that counter cultural menopause narratives. Responses range from physical relief (migraine cessation) to psychological liberation (feeling like one’s “true self”), spiritual transformation (losing religious constraints), and social freedom (indifference to others’ opinions). This crowdsourced wisdom—contrasting with the earlier singular horror story—demonstrates menopause’s multifaceted nature. The rapid, stoplight-checked replies structurally mirror how insights about aging can arrive unpredictably, reshaping the narrator’s (and reader’s) understanding from monolithic dread to nuanced possibility.

      5. Evaluate how the chapter balances humor and gravity in discussing family and bodily transitions.

      Answer:
      The narrative deftly oscillates between levity and profundity: the parents’ script-writing includes comedic debate over phrasing (“say it more neutrally”), while addressing serious family restructuring. The dropped doctor’s office script imagines reactions ranging from admiration to pity, humorously acknowledging societal judgment. Medical humor (“Was I sexually active? And how!”) contrasts with raw confessions (family suicides). Dr. Mendoza’s clinical metaphors about birth trauma lend gravity to the menopause discussion, while texts about postmenopausal freedom (“I feel like I’m 9”) inject playful optimism. This balance makes transformative life experiences feel authentically complex—neither trivialized nor overdramatized.

    Quotes

    • 1. “Divorce, just the word, used to feel serrated like a knife, something to wave around dangerously. Now I associated it with taxes, paperwork, bureaucracy.”

      This quote captures the narrator’s evolving perspective on divorce—from something emotionally charged to a mundane administrative process. It reflects the chapter’s theme of redefining relationships and family structures.

      2. “Picture how the vaginal canal squeezes the water out of a baby’s lungs—it’s the shock of this squeezing and the sudden cold air that makes the baby cry out and take their first breath! The trauma itself prepares them for the next phase, life on Earth.”

      Dr. Mendoza’s vivid metaphor connects physical transitions (like childbirth) to emotional ones (like menopause). This represents the chapter’s exploration of life phases and how upheaval can lead to growth.

      3. “a woman’s mental health postmenopause is usually better than it’s been at any other time in the life of that particular woman, other than maybe childhood.”

      This surprising insight challenges common negative perceptions of menopause. It introduces the chapter’s counter-narrative about the potential benefits of this life stage.

      4. “I feel like my true self. Like I’m 9 years old and I can do whatever I want”

      This response from the narrator’s text thread exemplifies the liberating aspects of postmenopausal life that the chapter highlights. It shows how shedding reproductive roles can lead to personal rediscovery.

      5. “in a patriarchy your body is technically not your own until you pass the reproductive age.”

      Dr. Mendoza’s blunt feminist analysis frames the chapter’s underlying argument about bodily autonomy and societal expectations. It connects personal experiences to broader systemic issues.

    Quotes

    1. “Divorce, just the word, used to feel serrated like a knife, something to wave around dangerously. Now I associated it with taxes, paperwork, bureaucracy.”

    This quote captures the narrator’s evolving perspective on divorce—from something emotionally charged to a mundane administrative process. It reflects the chapter’s theme of redefining relationships and family structures.

    2. “Picture how the vaginal canal squeezes the water out of a baby’s lungs—it’s the shock of this squeezing and the sudden cold air that makes the baby cry out and take their first breath! The trauma itself prepares them for the next phase, life on Earth.”

    Dr. Mendoza’s vivid metaphor connects physical transitions (like childbirth) to emotional ones (like menopause). This represents the chapter’s exploration of life phases and how upheaval can lead to growth.

    3. “a woman’s mental health postmenopause is usually better than it’s been at any other time in the life of that particular woman, other than maybe childhood.”

    This surprising insight challenges common negative perceptions of menopause. It introduces the chapter’s counter-narrative about the potential benefits of this life stage.

    4. “I feel like my true self. Like I’m 9 years old and I can do whatever I want”

    This response from the narrator’s text thread exemplifies the liberating aspects of postmenopausal life that the chapter highlights. It shows how shedding reproductive roles can lead to personal rediscovery.

    5. “in a patriarchy your body is technically not your own until you pass the reproductive age.”

    Dr. Mendoza’s blunt feminist analysis frames the chapter’s underlying argument about bodily autonomy and societal expectations. It connects personal experiences to broader systemic issues.

    FAQs

    1. How do the parents prepare to explain their “nonconforming family” structure to their child, and what concerns do they have about this conversation?

    Answer:
    The parents carefully prepare a script in a shared Google doc to explain their transition from a romantic relationship to a deep friendship while maintaining their family unit. They worry about phrasing things awkwardly (“being romantic together” sounds potentially creepy) or saying something disturbing. Harris expresses concern about future divorce making their current explanation seem fraudulent, though both agree this is unlikely soon. The mother rehearses the speech extensively, even accidentally dropping the script at a doctor’s office, showing both their meticulous preparation and underlying anxiety about conveying this complex family dynamic appropriately to their child.

    2. What significant revelation does Dr. Mendoza share about postmenopausal mental health, and how does this contrast with the narrator’s previous understanding?

    Answer:
    Dr. Mendoza reveals that women’s mental health postmenopause is typically better than at any other life stage except possibly childhood, due to stabilizing hormones and no longer cycling between estrogen/progesterone. This starkly contrasts with the narrator’s earlier fearful perception shaped by her friend Mary’s negative experiences. The doctor frames this as both biological (hormonal stability) and sociological (escaping patriarchal constraints on reproductive-age bodies). This prompts the narrator to actively seek positive menopausal experiences from other women, shifting her perspective from dread to curiosity about this life phase.

    3. Analyze how the chapter uses medical examinations as a metaphor for life transitions.

    Answer:
    The gynecological exam becomes an extended metaphor for life transitions - the “cold metal beak” intrusion mirroring the discomfort of change, while Dr. Mendoza’s explanation of birth trauma (“vaginal canal squeezing water from lungs”) parallels how difficult transitions prepare us for new phases. The narrator moves from passive patient (“casting myself as a passive child around doctors”) to actively inquiring about postmenopausal life, symbolizing her growing agency. Even the dropped script during the exam represents vulnerability in transition. The clinical setting underscores how bodily and existential transitions are intertwined, with medical authority both guiding and contrasting with personal revelation.

    4. How does the narrator’s open-sourcing experiment with older women reshape the chapter’s thematic exploration of menopause?

    Answer:
    The spontaneous text survey provides diverse, overwhelmingly positive perspectives that counter cultural menopause narratives. Responses range from physical relief (migraine cessation) to psychological liberation (feeling like one’s “true self”), spiritual transformation (losing religious constraints), and social freedom (indifference to others’ opinions). This crowdsourced wisdom—contrasting with the earlier singular horror story—demonstrates menopause’s multifaceted nature. The rapid, stoplight-checked replies structurally mirror how insights about aging can arrive unpredictably, reshaping the narrator’s (and reader’s) understanding from monolithic dread to nuanced possibility.

    5. Evaluate how the chapter balances humor and gravity in discussing family and bodily transitions.

    Answer:
    The narrative deftly oscillates between levity and profundity: the parents’ script-writing includes comedic debate over phrasing (“say it more neutrally”), while addressing serious family restructuring. The dropped doctor’s office script imagines reactions ranging from admiration to pity, humorously acknowledging societal judgment. Medical humor (“Was I sexually active? And how!”) contrasts with raw confessions (family suicides). Dr. Mendoza’s clinical metaphors about birth trauma lend gravity to the menopause discussion, while texts about postmenopausal freedom (“I feel like I’m 9”) inject playful optimism. This balance makes transformative life experiences feel authentically complex—neither trivialized nor overdramatized.

    Note