Gods & Monsters
Take Me to Church
by Mahurin, ShelbyReid finds temporary refuge in a cramped, musty cabin aboard a ship, where he attempts to distract himself from his turmoil by focusing on mundane tasks like preparing a meager meal. Despite his efforts, his physical hunger remains unsatisfied, mirroring his emotional unrest. His thoughts spiral back to a woman he both resents and desires, haunted by her accusations of his involvement with witches and murder. The internal conflict is palpable as he grapples with guilt, self-loathing, and an unshakable attraction he cannot rationalize away.
Lou’s sudden entrance disrupts Reid’s brooding, her presence both agitating and captivating him. She confronts his sulking with characteristic boldness, revealing a plan to rescue his mother by pretending to surrender to their enemies. Reid’s initial skepticism gives way to reluctant engagement, though his body language and reactions betray his inner struggle. Lou’s proximity and unguarded appearance—loose clothing, wild hair—further unsettle him, highlighting the tension between his disdain and attraction.
The plan involves deceiving their adversary, Auguste, by feigning capture, then regrouping with allies, including supernatural beings like witches and werewolves. Reid’s hesitation and Lou’s insistence clash, as she accuses him of self-sabotage and martyrdom. Her fiery reprimand underscores her determination to keep him from sacrificing himself, while Reid’s reactions—anger, embarrassment—reveal his vulnerability. Their exchange is charged with unresolved tension, blending frustration, concern, and unspoken desire.
Lou’s final outburst cuts through Reid’s defenses, bluntly addressing his conflicted emotions: his love for his mother, his shame over his desires, and his self-destructive impulses. Her words—sharp, profane, and unyielding—force him to confront his hypocrisy. The chapter ends with their dynamic unresolved, leaving Reid torn between his moral convictions and the undeniable pull of his feelings, setting the stage for further conflict and emotional reckoning.
FAQs
1. Comprehension: What internal conflict is Reid grappling with in this chapter, and how does it manifest in his actions?
Answer:
Reid is torn between his ingrained beliefs about witches and his growing emotional connection to Lou. This conflict manifests physically as he struggles with guilt, disgust, and attraction—pushing away food despite hunger, clenching his hands to avoid touching her hair, and feeling physical pain at the thought of leaving her. His mental turmoil is evident when he considers extreme solutions like imprisonment or death as ways to resolve his moral crisis, showing how deeply his identity and values are being challenged by his experiences.2. Analytical: How does Lou’s approach to confronting Reid reveal her understanding of his character and their relationship dynamic?
Answer:
Lou demonstrates keen insight into Reid’s self-sacrificial tendencies by anticipating his desire to “ruin” her plan through martyrdom. Her forceful physical proximity (standing toe-to-toe) and blunt language (“Get over your self”) reveal she’s learned to bypass his stubbornness through confrontation rather than persuasion. By framing his potential sacrifice as an inconvenience to her (“I’ll also have to rescue you”), she strategically appeals to his protective instincts rather than his guilt, showing she understands his need to feel useful while subtly acknowledging their mutual care.3. Critical Thinking: The chapter repeatedly contrasts “clear, tangible solutions” with emotional complexity. How does this motif reflect Reid’s psychological state?
Answer:
The motif highlights Reid’s desperate attempt to apply logical, action-based problem-solving (eating to cure hunger, considering prison/death as moral solutions) to emotional dilemmas that defy simple resolution. His frustration when physical actions fail to alleviate guilt (“The pain in my stomach didn’t ease”) mirrors his broader crisis—he’s a man trained for decisive action now trapped in ambiguous loyalties. The recurring contrast underscores his growing awareness that human relationships (especially with Lou) can’t be “solved” like practical problems, forcing him toward uncomfortable emotional maturity.4. Application: If you were to dramatize the cabin scene for film, what three sensory details from the text would you emphasize to convey Reid’s inner turmoil, and why?
Answer:
- Mildew/salt smell: Reinforces his discomfort in this transitional space, mirroring his moral “uncleanliness.”
- Lou’s loosened lace collar: The exposed collarbone becomes a visual metaphor for vulnerability—both hers (trusting him despite danger) and his (weakening resolve).
- The audible plate clatter: When he shoves food away, the sudden noise would sharply contrast earlier methodical eating, externalizing his emotional breaking point. These details collectively create an atmosphere of tense intimacy where every sensory input heightens his internal conflict.
5. Evaluation: Lou declares her plan “brilliant” while Reid calls courtroom events “bad.” How do these opposing value judgments reflect their differing worldviews?
Answer:
Lou’s “brilliant” assessment reflects her adaptable, strategic mindset—she sees potential in chaos and values clever deception. Reid’s “bad” condemnation stems from his black-and-white morality; the courtroom exposed his mother’s suffering and his own compromised principles. Where Lou focuses on future possibilities (the rescue plan), Reid fixates on past failures (his perceived moral collapse). This contrast encapsulates their fundamental difference: Lou operates in shades of gray to survive, while Reid struggles to reconcile his rigid upbringing with complex realities.- Mildew/salt smell: Reinforces his discomfort in this transitional space, mirroring his moral “uncleanliness.”
Quotes
1. “I’d thought myself convicted. I’d never heard conviction until this day.”
This quote captures Reid’s realization of the depth of Lou’s determination compared to his own. It marks a turning point where he recognizes her unwavering resolve, contrasting with his internal conflict.
2. “I hated her. I hated that I didn’t hate her at all.”
This powerful contradiction reveals Reid’s central emotional struggle - his growing attachment to Lou despite his ingrained prejudices against witches. It encapsulates the chapter’s theme of conflicted desire.
3. “You aren’t going to prison because you love your mother. You aren’t going to die because you want to fuck a witch. Get—over—your—self.”
Lou’s blunt confrontation highlights the chapter’s key tension - Reid’s self-destructive tendencies versus their need to work together. Her profane challenge cuts through his moral paralysis with pragmatic urgency.
4. “The right thing rarely was.”
This succinct statement reflects Reid’s moral dilemma about doing what’s ethically correct versus what feels impossible. It underscores the chapter’s exploration of difficult choices and personal sacrifice.
5. “We’ll rescue you. I don’t know how, but we will. I promise.”
This promise represents both hope and the central mission driving the characters forward. It’s significant as it shows commitment persisting despite overwhelming odds, a theme that defines the chapter’s emotional core.