CHAPTER 18 – A Rock Ahead

In Chapter 18, “A Rock Ahead,” of “Worldly Ways and Byways,” the narrator reflects on the societal role and positioning of women in America, contrasting it unfavorably with the more integrated roles women play in the lives and businesses of their husbands in Europe. While wandering near the bustling stores of Twenty-third Street, the narrator observes a constant stream of women engaging in seemingly endless shopping, which he views as a sad commentary on their misplaced priorities and disconnectedness from their families’ real needs and financial situations.

The chapter critiques the American norm of elevating women to a pedestal, arguing that it does them a disservice by not engaging them in the practical and financial aspects of life, thereby making them less effective partners to their husbands. This idealization leads to a disconnect, with women spending their time in meaningless pursuits like bargain hunting, unaware or uninvolved in their husbands’ work and financial struggles. In contrast, the text romanticizes the European model, where wives are directly involved in their husbands’ businesses, sharing both the burdens and the successes, fostering a closer and more functional partnership.

The narrative continues with examples illustrating the societal expectation for American men to bear the financial burden alone, while their wives, isolated from the realities of their husbands’ work, engage in frivolous activities and luxuries they cannot afford. This situation creates tension and misunderstanding within marriages, as women are depicted as living in ignorance of their husbands’ toils and financial stresses. The narrator laments this “unnatural position” of women in America, contrasting it with a more communal approach observed in Europe, where both partners share responsibilities and work towards common goals, including in the business realm.

The chapter concludes by highlighting the incongruity between the social expectations placed on men to fulfill both their business obligations and cater to their wives’ social aspirations. This dichotomy strains marriages and leaves men exhausted from trying to uphold these dual expectations. The narrator’s observations serve as a caution against the pedestalization of women to the point of detaching them from the real struggles and partnerships of life, advocating instead for a model that fosters mutual support and shared responsibilities within marriages.