Cover of If These Wings Could Fly
    FantasyFictionLiterary FictionYoung Adult

    If These Wings Could Fly

    by McCauley, Kyrie
    If These Wings Could Fly by Kyrie McCauley is a lyrical young adult novel that explores the complexities of family violence through the story of seventeen-year-old Leighton. As she starts her senior year, Leighton struggles to protect her two younger sisters while coping with her father’s ongoing abusive behavior. The narrative incorporates elements of magical realism, using the presence of thousands of crows to underscore themes of trauma, resilience, and hope.

    The chap­ter opens with a serene week­end at home, where the nar­ra­tor finds solace in the qui­et and mun­dane moments shared with her fam­i­ly. This calm is a stark con­trast to the usu­al chaos in their lives, offer­ing a fleet­ing sense of nor­mal­cy that feels both pre­cious and frag­ile. Despite the peace, a sub­tle under­cur­rent of appre­hen­sion lingers, hint­ing that this tran­quil­i­ty might be tem­po­rary.

    As Sun­day pro­gress­es, the fam­i­ly attempts to recon­nect through a game night, a tra­di­tion from their past that car­ries both nos­tal­gia and com­plex­i­ty. The father’s sug­ges­tion sparks cau­tious hope among the sib­lings, who are will­ing to embrace this rare moment of har­mo­ny. How­ev­er, ten­sions rise quick­ly when the father dis­cov­ers his wal­let is miss­ing, an event that dis­rupts the frag­ile calm and reveals the under­ly­ing stress and volatil­i­ty present in the house­hold.

    The recov­ery of the wal­let brings a brief relief, yet the father’s frus­tra­tion and sub­se­quent apol­o­gy under­score the ongo­ing strug­gles with­in the fam­i­ly dynam­ic. The mother’s efforts to main­tain peace and the children’s silent obser­va­tions expose the emo­tion­al toll that the father’s behav­ior exerts on every­one. The chap­ter poignant­ly illus­trates the del­i­cate bal­ance between hope and fear, as the fam­i­ly nav­i­gates the com­plex­i­ties of love, anger, and for­give­ness.

    The nar­ra­tive delves into the father’s trou­bled past, unveil­ing a lega­cy of abuse and trau­ma inher­it­ed from his own father, a war vet­er­an whose harsh­ness shaped the family’s emo­tion­al land­scape. This gen­er­a­tional cycle of pain and anger is por­trayed as a heavy inher­i­tance, with fear as its last­ing imprint. The chap­ter clos­es with a somber reflec­tion on how the past con­tin­ues to influ­ence the present, shap­ing the family’s strug­gles and their attempts to break free from this painful lega­cy.

    FAQs

    • 1. How does the narrator describe the atmosphere of the weekend before the family game night, and what significance does this have for the narrator’s perception of normalcy?

      Answer:
      The narrator describes the weekend as passing “like a dream,” emphasizing a quiet calm that feels like a retreat from the chaos usually present. This calm is associated with normalcy and mundane activities, which the narrator views as “magnificent” because they contrast sharply with their typical life. This peaceful interlude offers the narrator a brief respite and a hopeful glimpse of stability, underscoring how rare and precious such moments of ordinary family life feel to them.

      2. What role does the missing wallet incident play in the dynamic of the family during game night?

      Answer:
      The missing wallet incident serves as a tension point that disrupts the fragile calm the family is trying to enjoy. The father’s anger and frustration surface quickly, revealing underlying stress and volatility. Although the wallet is eventually found, the episode shifts the mood from hopeful to uneasy, symbolized by the narrator’s metaphor of crossing a rickety bridge. It highlights the precariousness of their peace and the underlying instability in their family relationships, despite efforts to create normal, happy moments.

      3. Analyze the significance of the narrator’s reflections on their father’s past and the legacy of anger in the family. How does this context deepen the reader’s understanding of the family’s struggles?

      Answer:
      The narrator’s insights into the father’s childhood—marked by abuse and cigarette burns inflicted by a strict and mean grandfather—provide critical context for the family’s current struggles. The legacy of trauma and anger is portrayed as cyclical, passed down through generations like an inheritance of fear. This background explains the father’s own anger and the difficulty he has in breaking free from that pattern. It deepens the reader’s understanding by framing the family’s dysfunction not as isolated incidents but as part of a larger, intergenerational trauma that shapes their behavior and emotional responses.

      4. Considering the narrator’s observations and the family’s attempt at game night, what might the chapter suggest about the challenges of healing and maintaining hope within a troubled family?

      Answer:
      The chapter suggests that healing and maintaining hope in a troubled family are complex and fragile processes. While moments of normalcy and connection—like the game night—offer temporary relief and the possibility of change, underlying issues such as unresolved anger, fear, and trauma persistently threaten to undermine these efforts. The narrator’s internal conflict, recognizing both the desire to believe in improvement and the caution born of past disappointments, illustrates the emotional difficulty of sustaining hope. The chapter portrays healing as a gradual, uncertain journey that requires resilience even when setbacks occur.

      5. How does the narrator use symbolism, such as the rickety bridge and the picture frame, to convey the emotional state of the family?

      Answer:
      Symbolism in the chapter vividly conveys the family’s emotional fragility. The rickety bridge with falling planks symbolizes the precariousness of their current peace and the urgency to move forward before it collapses entirely. It captures the tension and instability beneath the surface of their interactions. The picture frame, precariously hanging and silently implored to “stay,” reflects the narrator’s hope that their family’s fragile unity will hold despite past and ongoing difficulties. These symbols deepen the emotional resonance of the narrative, illustrating the delicate balance between hope and fear in the family’s life.

    Quotes

    • 1. “When you live in chaos, boring is a retreat. The mundane is magnificent.”

      This quote captures the chapter’s theme of finding solace in normalcy amidst turmoil. It highlights the protagonist’s appreciation for quiet, uneventful moments as a temporary refuge from their chaotic life.

      2. “I wish that there were a voice narrating my life, just so that every time I dared to think All is well, some booming voice would say, ‘All was not well.’ It would remind me, on nights like this, not to get complacent.”

      Here, the narrator reveals a deep awareness of the fragile nature of peace in their family life. This introspective statement underscores the tension between hope and the expectation of inevitable conflict, setting the emotional tone for the chapter.

      3. “Sometimes I think they only see some past version of each other. Like she loves who he used to be. I wonder if it feels like loving a ghost. I wonder if it feels like mourning.”

      This poignant observation reflects on the complex dynamics of the parents’ relationship, suggesting that love may be intertwined with loss and memory rather than present reality. It offers insight into the emotional undercurrents that shape the family’s interactions.

      4. “My grandfather fought in a war and came back broken. My father grew up in a house that held anger like a stone in its palm. Like it was something worth keeping. And that became the shape of our family tree. When the legacy is anger, the inheritance is fear.”

      This powerful passage connects generational trauma and its impact on the family’s emotional landscape. It articulates the chapter’s central argument about how past suffering perpetuates cycles of anger and fear within families.

    Quotes

    1. “When you live in chaos, boring is a retreat. The mundane is magnificent.”

    This quote captures the chapter’s theme of finding solace in normalcy amidst turmoil. It highlights the protagonist’s appreciation for quiet, uneventful moments as a temporary refuge from their chaotic life.

    2. “I wish that there were a voice narrating my life, just so that every time I dared to think All is well, some booming voice would say, ‘All was not well.’ It would remind me, on nights like this, not to get complacent.”

    Here, the narrator reveals a deep awareness of the fragile nature of peace in their family life. This introspective statement underscores the tension between hope and the expectation of inevitable conflict, setting the emotional tone for the chapter.

    3. “Sometimes I think they only see some past version of each other. Like she loves who he used to be. I wonder if it feels like loving a ghost. I wonder if it feels like mourning.”

    This poignant observation reflects on the complex dynamics of the parents’ relationship, suggesting that love may be intertwined with loss and memory rather than present reality. It offers insight into the emotional undercurrents that shape the family’s interactions.

    4. “My grandfather fought in a war and came back broken. My father grew up in a house that held anger like a stone in its palm. Like it was something worth keeping. And that became the shape of our family tree. When the legacy is anger, the inheritance is fear.”

    This powerful passage connects generational trauma and its impact on the family’s emotional landscape. It articulates the chapter’s central argument about how past suffering perpetuates cycles of anger and fear within families.

    FAQs

    1. How does the narrator describe the atmosphere of the weekend before the family game night, and what significance does this have for the narrator’s perception of normalcy?

    Answer:
    The narrator describes the weekend as passing “like a dream,” emphasizing a quiet calm that feels like a retreat from the chaos usually present. This calm is associated with normalcy and mundane activities, which the narrator views as “magnificent” because they contrast sharply with their typical life. This peaceful interlude offers the narrator a brief respite and a hopeful glimpse of stability, underscoring how rare and precious such moments of ordinary family life feel to them.

    2. What role does the missing wallet incident play in the dynamic of the family during game night?

    Answer:
    The missing wallet incident serves as a tension point that disrupts the fragile calm the family is trying to enjoy. The father’s anger and frustration surface quickly, revealing underlying stress and volatility. Although the wallet is eventually found, the episode shifts the mood from hopeful to uneasy, symbolized by the narrator’s metaphor of crossing a rickety bridge. It highlights the precariousness of their peace and the underlying instability in their family relationships, despite efforts to create normal, happy moments.

    3. Analyze the significance of the narrator’s reflections on their father’s past and the legacy of anger in the family. How does this context deepen the reader’s understanding of the family’s struggles?

    Answer:
    The narrator’s insights into the father’s childhood—marked by abuse and cigarette burns inflicted by a strict and mean grandfather—provide critical context for the family’s current struggles. The legacy of trauma and anger is portrayed as cyclical, passed down through generations like an inheritance of fear. This background explains the father’s own anger and the difficulty he has in breaking free from that pattern. It deepens the reader’s understanding by framing the family’s dysfunction not as isolated incidents but as part of a larger, intergenerational trauma that shapes their behavior and emotional responses.

    4. Considering the narrator’s observations and the family’s attempt at game night, what might the chapter suggest about the challenges of healing and maintaining hope within a troubled family?

    Answer:
    The chapter suggests that healing and maintaining hope in a troubled family are complex and fragile processes. While moments of normalcy and connection—like the game night—offer temporary relief and the possibility of change, underlying issues such as unresolved anger, fear, and trauma persistently threaten to undermine these efforts. The narrator’s internal conflict, recognizing both the desire to believe in improvement and the caution born of past disappointments, illustrates the emotional difficulty of sustaining hope. The chapter portrays healing as a gradual, uncertain journey that requires resilience even when setbacks occur.

    5. How does the narrator use symbolism, such as the rickety bridge and the picture frame, to convey the emotional state of the family?

    Answer:
    Symbolism in the chapter vividly conveys the family’s emotional fragility. The rickety bridge with falling planks symbolizes the precariousness of their current peace and the urgency to move forward before it collapses entirely. It captures the tension and instability beneath the surface of their interactions. The picture frame, precariously hanging and silently implored to “stay,” reflects the narrator’s hope that their family’s fragile unity will hold despite past and ongoing difficulties. These symbols deepen the emotional resonance of the narrative, illustrating the delicate balance between hope and fear in the family’s life.

    Note