If These Wings Could Fly
Chapter Sixty
by McCauley, KyrieIn this chapter, the narrator and Liam revisit a secluded spot where they previously shared time together, finding comfort in the quiet and the warmth of the car’s hood under a blanket. The scene is peaceful, surrounded by trees that seem to protect their small world. Their shared silence speaks to a mutual desire for solitude, yet also a unique closeness that allows them to be alone together. The atmosphere reflects both the intimacy and the complexity of their relationship as they navigate personal and communal challenges.
The narrator reveals to Liam that she submitted an essay critical of their hometown, Auburn, to a scholarship contest, risking local backlash since the essay would be published if she wins. This disclosure brings tension, as Liam expresses concern for her safety, highlighting the risks involved in speaking out. Their conversation reveals the narrator’s internal struggle between the desire to expose uncomfortable truths and the fear of the consequences, underscoring the theme of courage amid vulnerability.
Liam shares his own feelings of alienation within Auburn despite his success, describing the pressure to maintain a flawless image to avoid rejection. He acknowledges the town’s selective acceptance of his identity, which weighs heavily on him. Their exchange contrasts his external vigilance with the narrator’s hypervigilance at home, illustrating the different ways they cope with societal judgment. Both express a shared hope for a future beyond the limitations of their current environment, emphasizing resilience and the longing for freedom.
The chapter closes with a tender moment where Liam praises the narrator’s bravery and admits his affection began with her quiet strength and surprising outburst in class. Their playful banter reveals deep affection and mutual respect, reinforcing their bond. Despite the narrator’s doubts about being fully accepted, Liam’s unwavering support highlights a theme of unconditional love and acceptance, affirming their commitment to face challenges together.
FAQs
1. How does the setting of the car hood under the star-spotted night sky contribute to the mood and themes of the chapter?
Answer:
The setting of Liam and the narrator sitting on the warm hood of his car beneath a circle of treetops framing a starry sky creates an intimate and contemplative mood. This natural, protected space—described as being guarded by “giant sentinels”—symbolizes a safe haven where the characters can be vulnerable and open. The imagery supports themes of protection, solitude, and connection. It also contrasts with the tension and challenges they face in their everyday lives, highlighting their need for moments of peace and mutual support as they navigate personal and social struggles.2. What internal and external conflicts does Liam reveal in his conversation with the narrator, and how do these conflicts reflect broader themes in the chapter?
Answer:
Liam reveals an internal conflict of feeling pressured to maintain a flawless image to be accepted by his community, fearing rejection if he shows any imperfection or parts of his identity that the town does not embrace. Externally, he experiences the town’s conditional acceptance, where people admire his athletic success but might reject him if he diverges from expectations (e.g., kneeling before a game). This reflects broader themes of identity, societal expectations, and the emotional toll of “performing” to fit in. The chapter explores how both Liam and the narrator cope with these pressures differently, emphasizing the theme of authenticity versus conformity.3. In what ways does the narrator’s decision to submit an essay critical of their town to the township council serve as a catalyst for the chapter’s exploration of courage and vulnerability?
Answer:
The narrator’s submission of a candid essay about Auburn, potentially exposing uncomfortable truths, acts as a catalyst by bringing to the surface fears about safety and acceptance. This decision embodies courage because it risks social backlash and personal vulnerability, especially given the narrator’s concern about the essay being published in the local Gazette. It prompts a deep conversation with Liam about the cost of speaking out and the desire to no longer “hide in the shadows.” This act challenges the characters to confront their fears and consider the necessity of bravery in pursuing truth and change, reinforcing the chapter’s focus on resilience and self-expression.4. How do the characters’ differing experiences with “guarding” themselves illustrate the chapter’s commentary on fear and identity?
Answer:
Liam and the narrator both describe living with guardedness but in contrasting environments: Liam feels the need to uphold a perfect public persona to avoid prejudice within the town, while the narrator feels hypervigilant and afraid primarily within their own home. This contrast illustrates how fear shapes identity and behavior differently depending on context. The chapter comments on the pervasive nature of fear and the emotional exhaustion it causes, while also showing the importance of mutual understanding and support. Their shared experiences highlight the complexity of navigating identity in spaces that may not fully accept them.5. Reflecting on Liam’s confession about what initially attracted him to the narrator, what does this reveal about their relationship and the chapter’s portrayal of authenticity?
Answer:
Liam’s confession that he was first drawn to the narrator’s outward appearance but then became captivated by her unexpected bravery and outspoken nature reveals a relationship built on layers of genuine connection beyond superficial attraction. It shows that authenticity—expressed through the narrator’s willingness to speak up and challenge norms—is a core element of their bond. The chapter portrays authenticity as both difficult and powerful, suggesting that true connection arises when people reveal their true selves, even if it involves risk. This dynamic reinforces the chapter’s themes of courage, vulnerability, and the transformative power of being seen and accepted.
Quotes
1. “Turns out we can be alone together.”
This concise statement captures a key emotional insight of the chapter, highlighting the comfort and intimacy found in shared silence. It reflects the evolving relationship dynamic between the narrator and Liam, setting a tone of connection and mutual understanding early in the scene.
2. “I just think I would like to use writing to tell people things they ought to know about. To tell the truth.”
Here, the narrator reveals her motivation for pursuing journalism, emphasizing a commitment to truth and meaningful communication. This quote encapsulates a central theme of the chapter—using voice and writing as tools for honesty and change.
3. “This town only takes the parts of my identity it likes, ignores the rest. It’s exhausting.”
Liam’s reflection on his experience in their hometown exposes the complexities of identity and acceptance within a small community. This quote powerfully expresses feelings of conditional acceptance and the toll of constant vigilance, deepening the reader’s understanding of his character and the social environment.
4. “Some days I feel like I’m a hundred years old. Like being afraid has always been my life and it’s always going to be my life.”
The narrator’s candid admission about the weight of fear and hypervigilance conveys the emotional exhaustion she endures. This line poignantly illustrates the internal struggles that underpin her external actions and decisions.
5. “Leighton, if you think that asshole is gonna scare me away from loving you, you are ba”
Though cut off, this declaration from Liam serves as a powerful affirmation of his commitment and support. It functions as a turning point that reinforces the strength of their relationship against external challenges.
Quotes
1. “Turns out we can be alone together.”
This concise statement captures a key emotional insight of the chapter, highlighting the comfort and intimacy found in shared silence. It reflects the evolving relationship dynamic between the narrator and Liam, setting a tone of connection and mutual understanding early in the scene.
2. “I just think I would like to use writing to tell people things they ought to know about. To tell the truth.”
Here, the narrator reveals her motivation for pursuing journalism, emphasizing a commitment to truth and meaningful communication. This quote encapsulates a central theme of the chapter
— using voice and writing as tools for honesty and change.3. “This town only takes the parts of my identity it likes, ignores the rest. It’s exhausting.”
Liam’s reflection on his experience in their hometown exposes the complexities of identity and acceptance within a small community. This quote powerfully expresses feelings of conditional acceptance and the toll of constant vigilance, deepening the reader’s understanding of his character and the social environment.
4. “Some days I feel like I’m a hundred years old. Like being afraid has always been my life and it’s always going to be my life.”
The narrator’s candid admission about the weight of fear and hypervigilance conveys the emotional exhaustion she endures. This line poignantly illustrates the internal struggles that underpin her external actions and decisions.
5. “Leighton, if you think that asshole is gonna scare me away from loving you, you are ba”
Though cut off, this declaration from Liam serves as a powerful affirmation of his commitment and support. It functions as a turning point that reinforces the strength of their relationship against external challenges.
FAQs
1. How does the setting of the car hood under the star-spotted night sky contribute to the mood and themes of the chapter?
Answer:
The setting of Liam and the narrator sitting on the warm hood of his car beneath a circle of treetops framing a starry sky creates an intimate and contemplative mood. This natural, protected space—described as being guarded by “giant sentinels”—symbolizes a safe haven where the characters can be vulnerable and open. The imagery supports themes of protection, solitude, and connection. It also contrasts with the tension and challenges they face in their everyday lives, highlighting their need for moments of peace and mutual support as they navigate personal and social struggles.
2. What internal and external conflicts does Liam reveal in his conversation with the narrator, and how do these conflicts reflect broader themes in the chapter?
Answer:
Liam reveals an internal conflict of feeling pressured to maintain a flawless image to be accepted by his community, fearing rejection if he shows any imperfection or parts of his identity that the town does not embrace. Externally, he experiences the town’s conditional acceptance, where people admire his athletic success but might reject him if he diverges from expectations (e.g., kneeling before a game). This reflects broader themes of identity, societal expectations, and the emotional toll of “performing” to fit in. The chapter explores how both Liam and the narrator cope with these pressures differently, emphasizing the theme of authenticity versus conformity.
3. In what ways does the narrator’s decision to submit an essay critical of their town to the township council serve as a catalyst for the chapter’s exploration of courage and vulnerability?
Answer:
The narrator’s submission of a candid essay about Auburn, potentially exposing uncomfortable truths, acts as a catalyst by bringing to the surface fears about safety and acceptance. This decision embodies courage because it risks social backlash and personal vulnerability, especially given the narrator’s concern about the essay being published in the local Gazette. It prompts a deep conversation with Liam about the cost of speaking out and the desire to no longer “hide in the shadows.” This act challenges the characters to confront their fears and consider the necessity of bravery in pursuing truth and change, reinforcing the chapter’s focus on resilience and self-expression.
4. How do the characters’ differing experiences with “guarding” themselves illustrate the chapter’s commentary on fear and identity?
Answer:
Liam and the narrator both describe living with guardedness but in contrasting environments: Liam feels the need to uphold a perfect public persona to avoid prejudice within the town, while the narrator feels hypervigilant and afraid primarily within their own home. This contrast illustrates how fear shapes identity and behavior differently depending on context. The chapter comments on the pervasive nature of fear and the emotional exhaustion it causes, while also showing the importance of mutual understanding and support. Their shared experiences highlight the complexity of navigating identity in spaces that may not fully accept them.
5. Reflecting on Liam’s confession about what initially attracted him to the narrator, what does this reveal about their relationship and the chapter’s portrayal of authenticity?
Answer:
Liam’s confession that he was first drawn to the narrator’s outward appearance but then became captivated by her unexpected bravery and outspoken nature reveals a relationship built on layers of genuine connection beyond superficial attraction. It shows that authenticity—expressed through the narrator’s willingness to speak up and challenge norms—is a core element of their bond. The chapter portrays authenticity as both difficult and powerful, suggesting that true connection arises when people reveal their true selves, even if it involves risk. This dynamic reinforces the chapter’s themes of courage, vulnerability, and the transformative power of being seen and accepted.
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