If These Wings Could Fly
Chapter Fourteen
by McCauley, KyrieChapter Fourteen unfolds on a bustling Saturday morning at the Auburn Diner, a local hub where the Barnes family’s deep roots in the town are evident. The narrator reflects on the family legacy, built by her grandfather’s construction company, which physically shaped much of Auburn. Despite this proud heritage, there is an underlying tension, as the narrator begins to question the dual nature of her father—his public persona versus the private reality within their home. The family’s interactions reveal the complexities of maintaining appearances amidst personal struggles.
During their breakfast, the family encounters familiar faces, including Christine, a waitress and old friend of the narrator’s mother, and Officer DiMarco, a longtime family acquaintance. These interactions highlight the father’s growing isolation as he subtly discourages his wife from socializing, effectively pushing away those who might support her. The father’s attempt to smooth over tensions by treating the family to pancakes contrasts sharply with the narrator’s inner turmoil, underscoring the fragile veneer of normalcy they strive to uphold.
The chapter deepens as Officer DiMarco mentions a recent professional setback for the father, who lost a bid for a library renovation project. This news unsettles the family, particularly the mother, who senses the strain beneath her husband’s composed exterior. The father’s physical gesture toward his wife, a grip on her shoulder that seems both reassuring and controlling, reveals the complicated dynamics of their relationship. The children, especially Juniper, watch closely for cues on how to respond, illustrating the family’s silent endurance.
The narrator’s personal distress culminates in a visceral reaction to the breakfast, symbolizing the emotional weight she carries. Despite the outward smiles and polite farewells, the chapter closes with her fleeing to the restroom to vomit, a raw manifestation of her grief and fear. This poignant moment captures the painful contrast between the family’s public facade and the private suffering that defines their reality, leaving a lasting impression of vulnerability beneath the surface.
FAQs
1. How does the chapter portray the theme of legacy through the Barnes family and their history in Auburn?
Answer:
The chapter presents legacy as a complex and multifaceted concept, particularly through the Barnes family’s long-standing presence in Auburn. The grandfather’s legacy is tangible and enduring—his name and construction dates are literally carved into the town’s buildings, symbolizing a lasting physical impact and community contribution. However, the narrator questions the nature of legacy beyond public achievements, hinting at the duality of personal character (“how many men have two faces”) and suggesting that a legacy can be complicated by private behavior. This duality introduces the idea that legacies encompass both public successes and private struggles, shaping how future generations perceive their family history.2. What role does the Auburn Diner setting play in revealing family dynamics and character relationships in this chapter?
Answer:
The Auburn Diner serves as a social hub and a backdrop that highlights various family and community relationships. It is a place where the family gathers publicly, yet underlying tensions and personal struggles surface subtly. The waiting time for a table creates opportunities for small talk, revealing the father’s social ease contrasted with the narrator’s discomfort. Interactions with familiar figures like the waitress Christine and Officer DiMarco expose the father’s past prominence and current challenges, including his failed business bid and fractured friendships. The diner setting accentuates the contrast between outward appearances—family togetherness, social niceties—and the internal emotional strain experienced by the narrator and her mother.3. Analyze how the chapter uses food, specifically pancakes, as a symbol to deepen the narrative’s emotional impact.
Answer:
Pancakes in this chapter symbolize both an attempt at reconciliation and the underlying distress within the family. The father’s choice to apologize “with pancakes instead of flowers” suggests a desire to make amends in a modest, familiar way. However, the narrator’s reaction to eating the pancakes—gagging and eventually vomiting—reveals the emotional turmoil beneath the surface. The sweetness and comfort typically associated with pancakes starkly contrast with her feelings of fear, pain, and grief caused by her father’s behavior. This juxtaposition highlights the dissonance between appearances and reality, emphasizing how simple gestures can mask deeper familial dysfunction.4. What does the interaction between the narrator’s mother and the waitress Christine reveal about the mother’s social life and the father’s influence?
Answer:
The interaction suggests that the mother’s social life has been limited or controlled, largely due to the father’s influence. Although Christine warmly invites the mother to a girls’ night out, the father immediately intervenes, dismissing the invitation and implying that the mother cannot go. This exchange exposes the father’s controlling behavior and his role in isolating the mother from her friends, as indicated by the narrator’s observation that “one by one, Dad has found reasons to push people away” and that the mother eventually lets friendships slip away. This dynamic underscores the father’s dominance in the family and the mother’s constrained social freedom.5. How does the chapter convey the narrator’s internal conflict and emotional state during the family breakfast?
Answer:
The narrator’s internal conflict is conveyed through contrasting external events and her physical reactions. While the family engages in polite conversation and social pleasantries, the narrator experiences intense discomfort and fear, particularly due to her father’s unpredictable and sometimes cruel behavior. Her sore legs from sleeping in the armoire illustrate a physical manifestation of anxiety and insecurity. The moment she takes a bite of pancake and gags symbolizes her emotional rejection of the situation. Her eventual need to flee and vomit in the restroom reveals the depth of her distress and grief. These details communicate her struggle to maintain composure amid family dysfunction and the emotional toll it takes on her.
Quotes
1. “Legacy is a strange thing.”
This succinct statement captures the chapter’s exploration of family history and the complex nature of what is passed down through generations—not just tangible assets like buildings, but also the hidden, dual realities within a family.
2. “My grandfather’s legacy in this town is literally carved in stone—his name and the dates of construction are chiseled into cement blocks on almost everything built here over the two decades when his business was booming. The legacy of the people he employed. But I’m starting to wonder how many men have two faces. One for inside their home, and one for outside.”
This quote reveals the contrast between public success and private turmoil, highlighting the theme of duality in personal identity and legacy that runs through the chapter.
3. “One by one, Dad has found reasons to push people away. Your friends always hated me. They aren’t good influences on you. Eventually, she just let those friendships slip away.”
This passage illustrates how the father’s controlling behavior isolates the family, underscoring the emotional and social consequences of his actions and setting the tone for the family dynamics.
4. “I hate the bad nights. I hate how loud and cruel he can be. How scared he makes us. But it is mornings like this that hurt the most. When we are expected to pretend that everything is okay.”
Here, the narrator poignantly expresses the emotional pain caused not just by overt abuse but by the forced façade of normalcy, emphasizing the chapter’s focus on hidden suffering beneath everyday appearances.
5. “We smile. We nod. We say pleasant goodbyes. But the milk in my coffee tastes curdled, and the sugar turns to salt on my tongue, and I’m bolting from the table, barely making it to the diner restroom before I throw up flour and sugar and salt and grief.”
This powerful closing quote encapsulates the unbearable tension between outward politeness and inner turmoil, vividly portraying the narrator’s physical and emotional distress as a metaphor for the family’s fractured reality.
Quotes
1. “Legacy is a strange thing.”
This succinct statement captures the chapter’s exploration of family history and the complex nature of what is passed down through generations
— not just tangible assets like buildings, but also the hidden, dual realities within a family.2. “My grandfather’s legacy in this town is literally carved in stone—his name and the dates of construction are chiseled into cement blocks on almost everything built here over the two decades when his business was booming. The legacy of the people he employed. But I’m starting to wonder how many men have two faces. One for inside their home, and one for outside.”
This quote reveals the contrast between public success and private turmoil, highlighting the theme of duality in personal identity and legacy that runs through the chapter.
3. “One by one, Dad has found reasons to push people away. Your friends always hated me. They aren’t good influences on you. Eventually, she just let those friendships slip away.”
This passage illustrates how the father’s controlling behavior isolates the family, underscoring the emotional and social consequences of his actions and setting the tone for the family dynamics.
4. “I hate the bad nights. I hate how loud and cruel he can be. How scared he makes us. But it is mornings like this that hurt the most. When we are expected to pretend that everything is okay.”
Here, the narrator poignantly expresses the emotional pain caused not just by overt abuse but by the forced façade of normalcy, emphasizing the chapter’s focus on hidden suffering beneath everyday appearances.
5. “We smile. We nod. We say pleasant goodbyes. But the milk in my coffee tastes curdled, and the sugar turns to salt on my tongue, and I’m bolting from the table, barely making it to the diner restroom before I throw up flour and sugar and salt and grief.”
This powerful closing quote encapsulates the unbearable tension between outward politeness and inner turmoil, vividly portraying the narrator’s physical and emotional distress as a metaphor for the family’s fractured reality.
FAQs
1. How does the chapter portray the theme of legacy through the Barnes family and their history in Auburn?
Answer:
The chapter presents legacy as a complex and multifaceted concept, particularly through the Barnes family’s long-standing presence in Auburn. The grandfather’s legacy is tangible and enduring—his name and construction dates are literally carved into the town’s buildings, symbolizing a lasting physical impact and community contribution. However, the narrator questions the nature of legacy beyond public achievements, hinting at the duality of personal character (“how many men have two faces”) and suggesting that a legacy can be complicated by private behavior. This duality introduces the idea that legacies encompass both public successes and private struggles, shaping how future generations perceive their family history.
2. What role does the Auburn Diner setting play in revealing family dynamics and character relationships in this chapter?
Answer:
The Auburn Diner serves as a social hub and a backdrop that highlights various family and community relationships. It is a place where the family gathers publicly, yet underlying tensions and personal struggles surface subtly. The waiting time for a table creates opportunities for small talk, revealing the father’s social ease contrasted with the narrator’s discomfort. Interactions with familiar figures like the waitress Christine and Officer DiMarco expose the father’s past prominence and current challenges, including his failed business bid and fractured friendships. The diner setting accentuates the contrast between outward appearances—family togetherness, social niceties—and the internal emotional strain experienced by the narrator and her mother.
3. Analyze how the chapter uses food, specifically pancakes, as a symbol to deepen the narrative’s emotional impact.
Answer:
Pancakes in this chapter symbolize both an attempt at reconciliation and the underlying distress within the family. The father’s choice to apologize “with pancakes instead of flowers” suggests a desire to make amends in a modest, familiar way. However, the narrator’s reaction to eating the pancakes—gagging and eventually vomiting—reveals the emotional turmoil beneath the surface. The sweetness and comfort typically associated with pancakes starkly contrast with her feelings of fear, pain, and grief caused by her father’s behavior. This juxtaposition highlights the dissonance between appearances and reality, emphasizing how simple gestures can mask deeper familial dysfunction.
4. What does the interaction between the narrator’s mother and the waitress Christine reveal about the mother’s social life and the father’s influence?
Answer:
The interaction suggests that the mother’s social life has been limited or controlled, largely due to the father’s influence. Although Christine warmly invites the mother to a girls’ night out, the father immediately intervenes, dismissing the invitation and implying that the mother cannot go. This exchange exposes the father’s controlling behavior and his role in isolating the mother from her friends, as indicated by the narrator’s observation that “one by one, Dad has found reasons to push people away” and that the mother eventually lets friendships slip away. This dynamic underscores the father’s dominance in the family and the mother’s constrained social freedom.
5. How does the chapter convey the narrator’s internal conflict and emotional state during the family breakfast?
Answer:
The narrator’s internal conflict is conveyed through contrasting external events and her physical reactions. While the family engages in polite conversation and social pleasantries, the narrator experiences intense discomfort and fear, particularly due to her father’s unpredictable and sometimes cruel behavior. Her sore legs from sleeping in the armoire illustrate a physical manifestation of anxiety and insecurity. The moment she takes a bite of pancake and gags symbolizes her emotional rejection of the situation. Her eventual need to flee and vomit in the restroom reveals the depth of her distress and grief. These details communicate her struggle to maintain composure amid family dysfunction and the emotional toll it takes on her.
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