Search Jump: Comments
    Chapter Index
    Back to Story
    Cover of If These Wings Could Fly
    FantasyFictionLiterary FictionYoung Adult

    If These Wings Could Fly

    by McCauley, Kyrie
    If These Wings Could Fly by Kyrie McCauley is a lyrical young adult novel that explores the complexities of family violence through the story of seventeen-year-old Leighton. As she starts her senior year, Leighton struggles to protect her two younger sisters while coping with her father’s ongoing abusive behavior. The narrative incorporates elements of magical realism, using the presence of thousands of crows to underscore themes of trauma, resilience, and hope.
    PreviousNext
    If These Wings Could Fly

    Chapter Fifty-Six

    by McCauley, Kyrie

    In this emo­tion­al­ly charged chap­ter, the pro­tag­o­nist grap­ples with the sud­den absence of a sig­nif­i­cant fig­ure, sym­bol­ized by the miss­ing truck in the over­flow park­ing field. Over­come by a suf­fo­cat­ing ache, she finds solace in the unex­pect­ed pres­ence of her friend Sofia, whose empa­thy and steady sup­port offer a brief respite from her tur­moil. Their qui­et moment togeth­er, amidst the cold and flur­ries, under­scores the depth of the pro­tag­o­nist’s inter­nal strug­gle and the impor­tance of friend­ship in times of dis­tress.

    The con­ver­sa­tion between the two reveals the pro­tag­o­nist’s ongo­ing dif­fi­cul­ties at home, high­light­ing a tense and painful fam­i­ly dynam­ic that she has long tried to con­ceal. Sofia’s per­cep­tive­ness and unwa­ver­ing pres­ence pro­vide a safe space for the pro­tag­o­nist to acknowl­edge her real­i­ty. Sofia’s offer of refuge and under­stand­ing empha­sizes the theme of cho­sen fam­i­ly and the pow­er of com­pas­sion­ate allies in nav­i­gat­ing per­son­al crises.

    As the pro­tag­o­nist returns to the sta­di­um, the encounter with her moth­er intro­duces a com­plex lay­er of famil­ial rela­tion­ships and the yearn­ing for safe­ty and nor­mal­cy. The men­tion of trans­porta­tion plans and a pos­si­ble vis­it to “Nana’s place” sig­nals a desire for escape and sta­bil­i­ty amid chaos. The chap­ter cap­tures the protagonist’s con­flict­ed feel­ings about home, which no longer feels like a place of com­fort but rather a source of pain and uncer­tain­ty.

    The clos­ing reflec­tions con­vey a poignant metaphor of iden­ti­ty and resilience, with the pro­tag­o­nist liken­ing her­self to a pow­er­ful, tumul­tuous sea­son rather than a gen­tle or pre­dictable one. This self-real­iza­tion embod­ies her deter­mi­na­tion to endure and trans­form her cir­cum­stances despite the dark­ness sur­round­ing her. The chap­ter ends on a note of cau­tious hope, sug­gest­ing that even in the midst of mourn­ing and hard­ship, miracles—however unconventional—are pos­si­ble.

    Down­load PDF Sum­ma­ry

    FAQs

    • 1. What emotional and physical reactions does the narrator experience upon discovering the truck is gone, and how does Sofia respond to support her?

      Answer:
      The narrator experiences intense emotional distress and physical symptoms upon realizing the truck is gone, describing chest aches and difficulty breathing as if “the thing in my chest is rattling its cage so hard it’s stealing my breath.” This vivid description conveys a panic or anxiety attack. Sofia responds with calm empathy and physical comfort, sitting beside her in the cold grass, rubbing circles on her back, and encouraging her to breathe. Sofia’s presence and gentle reassurance help the narrator regain composure, illustrating the importance of supportive friendship during moments of crisis.

      2. How does the chapter reveal the narrator’s family situation, and what role does Sofia play in acknowledging and addressing it?

      Answer:
      The chapter reveals that the narrator’s home life is troubled and possibly unsafe, hinted at by her reluctance to be at home and Sofia’s insight into the narrator’s discomfort around a certain male figure. Sofia acknowledges this reality compassionately, saying she’s known about the situation but pretended not to notice out of respect for the narrator’s privacy. She offers a concrete support option by leaving her bedroom window unlocked 24⁄7 for the narrator and her siblings to escape to if things become dangerous. This portrays Sofia as a trusted ally who understands the gravity of the narrator’s situation and is ready to provide refuge.

      3. Analyze the significance of the narrator’s reflection on seasons and the metaphor of the “season of the crows” in relation to her personal struggles.

      Answer:
      The narrator uses the metaphor of seasons to express her identity and emotional state. Unlike seasons associated with renewal or calmness—spring, summer, autumn leaves, or snow—she identifies with the “season of the crows,” symbolizing mourning, darkness, and messiness. This metaphor reflects her inner turmoil and the chaotic, painful nature of her current life circumstances. It suggests that her struggles are complex and not easily resolved, but also that she embraces her strength and authenticity despite the difficulties. The crows, often associated with transformation and intelligence, hint at her potential for resilience and change amid adversity.

      4. What does the narrator’s interaction with her mother and her thoughts about “home” reveal about her current state of mind and family dynamics?

      Answer:
      The narrator’s immediate embrace of her mother suggests a need for comfort and connection in a turbulent time. However, the mother’s statement about needing to “figure out a ride” and the narrator’s subsequent reflection that “nothing about Auburn feels like home anymore” reveal a fractured family dynamic and a sense of displacement. The narrator’s concept of home is complicated by fear and instability, contrasting with the traditional idea of home as a safe haven. This tension highlights her emotional struggle and desire for a true sense of belonging and security, which she currently lacks.

      5. How might the narrator’s experience at the game and her relationship with Sofia illustrate broader themes of friendship and resilience in the face of adversity?

      Answer:
      The narrator’s experience at the game, feeling overwhelmed and physically affected by her emotional pain, is mitigated by Sofia’s unwavering support, illustrating the power of friendship as a source of resilience. Sofia’s willingness to sit in the cold mud rather than leave to perform at halftime shows her prioritization of emotional support over social expectations. Their interaction highlights themes of loyalty, understanding, and the importance of having allies during difficult times. The narrator’s eventual decision to return to the game, bolstered by Sofia’s presence, demonstrates how friendship can empower individuals to face challenges and maintain hope amid hardship.

    Quotes

    • 1. “I feel like I’m suffocating. I lean my head down to my knees, hug them to me, and try to suck in enough air. The thing in my chest is rattling its cage so hard it’s stealing my breath.”

      This quote vividly expresses the protagonist’s acute emotional pain and anxiety, setting the tone of vulnerability and distress that permeates the chapter. It captures the physical manifestation of overwhelming inner turmoil, a central theme in this moment of crisis.

      2. “I’ve known you forever, Leighton. I know why you hardly ever want to hang out at your house. And you are never fully relaxed around him, even when his charm is turned way up. I’m not stupid. I knew. I just didn’t think you wanted me to know, so I pretended not to notice things.”

      Here, Sofia reveals her deep understanding of Leighton’s hidden struggles and the unspoken pain she endures at home. This quote highlights themes of friendship, empathy, and the silent burdens people carry, marking a pivotal moment of emotional honesty and support.

      3. “Listen, if it gets scary and you need a place to run away to, I’ll literally leave my bedroom window unlocked twenty-four seven. Just come right in. Bring Cam and June Bug. We’ll have a slumber party.”

      This quote underscores the theme of chosen family and the power of friendship as a safe haven. Sofia’s unconditional offer represents hope and solace amid hardship, reinforcing the importance of community and support systems in times of crisis.

      4. “I stick out my tongue and catch some snowflakes. They melt in an instant, and I wonder if that’s how my life will look. Here for a fleeting second, and then gone. If I don’t get through whatever this is, then that’s all I will be. A memory in my classmates’ minds. Their true-life crime story to tell at frat parties.”

      This reflection captures the protagonist’s fear of impermanence and insignificance, contemplating her own mortality and legacy. It poignantly conveys the fragility of life and the desperate desire to matter beyond fleeting existence.

      5. “I can be brave, like Campbell and Juniper think I am. Like I’m not just one little snowflake, about to disappear, but the whole storm. A force to be reckoned with. I’ll be an entire season, but my season is not the soft brown earth of spring or a blue-sky summer. I’m not drifting yellow leaves or crisp white snow. My season is inconvenient, messy, loud. The season of the crows. The color of mourning.”

      This powerful metaphor encapsulates the protagonist’s resolve to embrace her complex identity and struggles with strength and defiance. It marks a turning point of self-acceptance and determination to claim her own narrative, even if it is difficult and unconventional.

    Quotes

    1. “I feel like I’m suffocating. I lean my head down to my knees, hug them to me, and try to suck in enough air. The thing in my chest is rattling its cage so hard it’s stealing my breath.”

    This quote vividly expresses the protagonist’s acute emotional pain and anxiety, setting the tone of vulnerability and distress that permeates the chapter. It captures the physical manifestation of overwhelming inner turmoil, a central theme in this moment of crisis.

    2. “I’ve known you forever, Leighton. I know why you hardly ever want to hang out at your house. And you are never fully relaxed around him, even when his charm is turned way up. I’m not stupid. I knew. I just didn’t think you wanted me to know, so I pretended not to notice things.”

    Here, Sofia reveals her deep understanding of Leighton’s hidden struggles and the unspoken pain she endures at home. This quote highlights themes of friendship, empathy, and the silent burdens people carry, marking a pivotal moment of emotional honesty and support.

    3. “Listen, if it gets scary and you need a place to run away to, I’ll literally leave my bedroom window unlocked twenty-four seven. Just come right in. Bring Cam and June Bug. We’ll have a slumber party.”

    This quote underscores the theme of chosen family and the power of friendship as a safe haven. Sofia’s unconditional offer represents hope and solace amid hardship, reinforcing the importance of community and support systems in times of crisis.

    4. “I stick out my tongue and catch some snowflakes. They melt in an instant, and I wonder if that’s how my life will look. Here for a fleeting second, and then gone. If I don’t get through whatever this is, then that’s all I will be. A memory in my classmates’ minds. Their true-life crime story to tell at frat parties.”

    This reflection captures the protagonist’s fear of impermanence and insignificance, contemplating her own mortality and legacy. It poignantly conveys the fragility of life and the desperate desire to matter beyond fleeting existence.

    5. “I can be brave, like Campbell and Juniper think I am. Like I’m not just one little snowflake, about to disappear, but the whole storm. A force to be reckoned with. I’ll be an entire season, but my season is not the soft brown earth of spring or a blue-sky summer. I’m not drifting yellow leaves or crisp white snow. My season is inconvenient, messy, loud. The season of the crows. The color of mourning.”

    This powerful metaphor encapsulates the protagonist’s resolve to embrace her complex identity and struggles with strength and defiance. It marks a turning point of self-acceptance and determination to claim her own narrative, even if it is difficult and unconventional.

    FAQs

    1. What emotional and physical reactions does the narrator experience upon discovering the truck is gone, and how does Sofia respond to support her?

    Answer:
    The narrator experiences intense emotional distress and physical symptoms upon realizing the truck is gone, describing chest aches and difficulty breathing as if “the thing in my chest is rattling its cage so hard it’s stealing my breath.” This vivid description conveys a panic or anxiety attack. Sofia responds with calm empathy and physical comfort, sitting beside her in the cold grass, rubbing circles on her back, and encouraging her to breathe. Sofia’s presence and gentle reassurance help the narrator regain composure, illustrating the importance of supportive friendship during moments of crisis.

    2. How does the chapter reveal the narrator’s family situation, and what role does Sofia play in acknowledging and addressing it?

    Answer:
    The chapter reveals that the narrator’s home life is troubled and possibly unsafe, hinted at by her reluctance to be at home and Sofia’s insight into the narrator’s discomfort around a certain male figure. Sofia acknowledges this reality compassionately, saying she’s known about the situation but pretended not to notice out of respect for the narrator’s privacy. She offers a concrete support option by leaving her bedroom window unlocked 24⁄7 for the narrator and her siblings to escape to if things become dangerous. This portrays Sofia as a trusted ally who understands the gravity of the narrator’s situation and is ready to provide refuge.

    3. Analyze the significance of the narrator’s reflection on seasons and the metaphor of the “season of the crows” in relation to her personal struggles.

    Answer:
    The narrator uses the metaphor of seasons to express her identity and emotional state. Unlike seasons associated with renewal or calmness—spring, summer, autumn leaves, or snow—she identifies with the “season of the crows,” symbolizing mourning, darkness, and messiness. This metaphor reflects her inner turmoil and the chaotic, painful nature of her current life circumstances. It suggests that her struggles are complex and not easily resolved, but also that she embraces her strength and authenticity despite the difficulties. The crows, often associated with transformation and intelligence, hint at her potential for resilience and change amid adversity.

    4. What does the narrator’s interaction with her mother and her thoughts about “home” reveal about her current state of mind and family dynamics?

    Answer:
    The narrator’s immediate embrace of her mother suggests a need for comfort and connection in a turbulent time. However, the mother’s statement about needing to “figure out a ride” and the narrator’s subsequent reflection that “nothing about Auburn feels like home anymore” reveal a fractured family dynamic and a sense of displacement. The narrator’s concept of home is complicated by fear and instability, contrasting with the traditional idea of home as a safe haven. This tension highlights her emotional struggle and desire for a true sense of belonging and security, which she currently lacks.

    5. How might the narrator’s experience at the game and her relationship with Sofia illustrate broader themes of friendship and resilience in the face of adversity?

    Answer:
    The narrator’s experience at the game, feeling overwhelmed and physically affected by her emotional pain, is mitigated by Sofia’s unwavering support, illustrating the power of friendship as a source of resilience. Sofia’s willingness to sit in the cold mud rather than leave to perform at halftime shows her prioritization of emotional support over social expectations. Their interaction highlights themes of loyalty, understanding, and the importance of having allies during difficult times. The narrator’s eventual decision to return to the game, bolstered by Sofia’s presence, demonstrates how friendship can empower individuals to face challenges and maintain hope amid hardship.

    Note