The Woman in Me (Britney Spears)
Chapter 31
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31
The conservatorship was created supposedly because I was incapable of doing
anything at all—feeding myself, spending my own money, being a mother,
anything. So why was it that a few weeks later, they had me shoot an episode of
How I Met Your Mother and then sent me on a grueling world tour?
After the conservatorship started, my mom and my brother’s girlfriend got
short haircuts and went out to dinner drinking wine—paparazzi were there,
taking their picture. It all felt set up. My dad took my boyfriend away and I
could not drive. My mom and dad took my womanhood from me. It was a win-
win for them.
I remained shocked that the state of California would let a man like my father
—an alcoholic, someone who’d declared bankruptcy, who’d failed in business,
who’d terri ed me as a little girl—control me after all my accomplishments and
everything I had done.
I thought about advice my father had given me over the years that I’d resisted,
and I wondered if I’d be able to resist anymore. My father presented the
conservatorship as a great stepping stone on the road to my “comeback.” Just
months earlier I’d released the best album of my career, but ne. What I heard in
what my father said was: “She’s great now! She’s working for us! It’s a perfect
situation for our family.”
Was it great for me? Or was it great for him?
How fun! I thought. I can go back to working again like nothing at all
happened! Too sick to choose my own boyfriend and yet somehow healthy enough to
appear on sitcoms and morning shows, and to perform for thousands of people in a
different part of the world every week!
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