The acknowledgments section of this book pays tribute to the collective effort and dedication of a wide array of individuals who played pivotal roles throughout the creation and publishing process. At the forefront, the author expresses profound gratitude towards Rachel Klayman, a longtime editor at Crown, for her sixteen years of guidance, meticulous attention to detail, and unwavering support. Sara Corbett’s editorial insight and creative input, along with her encouraging demeanor, markedly enhanced the quality of the book. Cody Keenan and Ben Rhodes, known for their respective roles in speech writing and editorial support, contributed significantly, offering both structural and content-based assistance. The author extends thanks to Samantha Power for her intense and valuable feedback and Meredith Bohen for her diligent research and fact-checking efforts.
The acknowledgment also highlights the indispensable support from the author’s staff, mentioning Anita Decker Breckenridge for managing the publishing process and Henock Dory for his professionalism and attention to detail. It recognizes the contributions of Emily Blakemore, Graham Gibson, Eric Schultz, and various other members of the team for their role in bringing the book to publication.
Furthermore, the author appreciates the former cabinet members and staff for their inspiring work that fueled the book’s insights. Special thanks are given to colleagues who shared their perspectives and memories, contributing to the book’s depth and authenticity. The chapter lists numerous individuals, from high-ranking officials to advisors, who offered feedback or served as resources during the writing process.
The section concludes with an acknowledgment of the supportive roles played by Penguin Random House, particularly Markus Dohle’s enthusiasm and Gina Centrello’s leadership. It mentions the strategic and creative efforts of David Drake and Tina Constable at Crown for overseeing the publication’s complex process with respect for the author’s vision.
This chapter serves as a heartfelt tribute to the community of colleagues, collaborators, and publishing professionals whose collective endeavor brought the book to fruition, especially during the uncertain times of a pandemic.
The acknowledgments section of the book opens with the author expressing uncertainty over where to begin due to the numerous individuals involved in the book’s creation, emphasizing their deep gratitude. Susan Dennard receives a heartfelt mention as an essential friend and collaborator, akin to a soulmate in numerous iconic duos, highlighting a relationship built on inside jokes and profound connection. Alex Bracken is recognized as one of the author’s earliest and most enduring friends in the publishing industry, celebrated for her unwavering support and belief in the author’s work. Biljana Likic is credited with keeping the author motivated through the writing process with her feedback and encouragement.
The author then thanks their agent, Tamar Rydzinski, for a life-changing opportunity, revealing the profound impact of their support. Cat Onder and Laura Bernier are acknowledged for their delightful collaboration and crucial role in polishing the book, with the whole team at Bloomsbury praised for their enthusiasm and efforts in bringing the series to the public. The author also expresses gratitude towards Dan Krokos, Erin Bowman, Mandy Hubbard, and Jennifer Armentrout for their support, alongside Brigid Kemmerer, Andrea Maas, and Kat Zhang for their critical early feedback.
Further appreciation is directed towards Elena of NovelSounds, Alexa of AlexaLovesBooks, Linnea of Linneart, and all the Throne of Glass Ambassadors for their support and dedication, highlighting the joy of their community. Finally, the author extends a heartfelt thanks to their parents and family for being their ultimate supporters, and to Annie, the dog, for love and companionship. This acknowledgments section beautifully encapsulates the collective effort and emotional support behind the creation of the book, emphasizing the value of relationships in artistic endeavors.
The acknowledgment section of “Outlive” gives a heartfelt and revealing glimpse into the collaborative efforts and personal determination that brought the book to fruition. Initially set aside in early 2020 after the authors were fired by their book agent and publisher for delayed manuscript submission, the project saw new life thanks to the intervention of Michael Ovitz. Ovitz’s encouragement led to the manuscript being presented to Diana Baroni at Penguin Random House, marking the turning of the tide for its publication.
The author credits the indispensable contributions of co-author Bill Gifford, who played a pivotal role in transforming the technical draft into a relatable and accessible narrative. Gifford is lauded as the author’s “translator,” helping to convey complex subjects with nuance and detail, and becoming a close friend in the process. Bob Kaplan, the head of research through 2021, is acknowledged for his rigorous pushback on ideas and for his work in organizing the book’s notes and fact-checking, alongside colleagues Vin Miller, Rachel Harrus, Sam Lipman, and Kathryn Birkenbach.
The author expresses gratitude for the generous expert feedback received on various sections of the manuscript from specialists across fields such as neurodegenerative diseases, sleep, cancer, nutrition, caloric restriction, centenarians, rapamycin, mTOR, atherosclerosis, and stability. This, alongside the rich experiences garnered from interactions with patients and podcast guests, underscores the collaborative and experiential foundation of the book.
Thankful nods are also given to friends and professionals who supported the book’s development, from early reading feedback to the careful crafting of the book’s cover design by Rodrigo Corral and team. The author also recognizes the support and sacrifice of his family—highlighting his wife Jill’s unwavering support despite the project’s demands on his time, and expressing a desire to now devote more time to his children, Olivia, Reese, and Ayrton.
Bill Gifford, in his part of the acknowledgment, extends a special thank you to Martha McGraw for her support and coaching throughout the challenging project, as well as to Bob Kaplan for his extensive research assistance. This section reveals the deeply human aspect of creating “Outlive,” centered on resilience, collaboration, and the interplay of professional and personal dedication.
The acknowledgments section of this book reveals the author’s complex relationship with storytelling and the exhaustive process of bringing a narrative to life. The author shares a candid glimpse into their personal struggles, including the fear of forgetting those who have supported them along the way. Amidst these challenges, they highlight the integral role of their support system, particularly emphasizing their father’s contribution, who was a sounding board for the initial brainstorming sessions that took place during walks in East Nashville. This passage underscores the author’s apprehension towards the formal act of acknowledgment, driven by a fear of omission caused by a self-admitted poor memory linked to their immersion in the world of books. The author’s reflection on this process is tinged with irony, especially given the thematic focus of the book on memory and its frailties. They confess that writing serves as a means to capture fleeting ideas before they escape, an activity that paradoxically both contributes to and mitigates their forgetfulness. The author’s ambivalence towards acknowledgments, their struggle with memory, and the key support provided by their father, all serve to preface the narrative that follows, providing a glimpse into the personal challenges and influences that have shaped the creation of the book.
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTs
Thank you to the following people who make my life blessed beyond all
measure:
To my husband, Josh: You got me through this year. (Through many
years before it, but this one in particular.) I don’t have the words to describe
how much I love you, and how grateful I am for all that you do. For the
countless meals you cooked so I didn’t have to stop writing; for the
hundreds of dishes you washed afterward so I could run back into my office
and keep working; for the hours of dog-walking, especially those early
mornings, just so I could get some sleep … This book is now a real book
because of you. Thank you for carrying me when I was too weary, for
wiping away my tears when my heart was heavy, and for coming with me
on so many adventures around the world.
To Annie, who can’t read this, but who deserves credit, anyway: Every
second with you is a gift. Thank you for making a fairly solitary job not the
slightest bit lonely—and for the laughter and joy and love you’ve brought
into my life. Love you, baby pup.
To Susan Dennard, my Threadsister and anam cara: Pretty sure I’m a
broken record at this point, but thank you for being a friend worth waiting
for, and for the fun, truly epic times we’ve had together. To Alex Bracken,
Erin Bowman, Lauren Billings, Christina Hobbs, Victoria Aveyard, Jennifer
L. Armentrout, Gena Showalter, and Claire Legrand: I’m so lucky to call
you guys my friends. I adore you all.
To my agent, Tamar Rydzinski: What would I do without you? You’ve
been my rock, my guiding star, and my fairy godmother from the very
beginning. Seven books later, I still don’t have the words to express my
gratitude. To my editor, Cat Onder: Working with you on these books has
been a highlight of my career. Thank you for your wisdom, your kindness,
and your editorial brilliance.
To my phenomenal teams at Bloomsbury worldwide and CAA—Cindy
Loh, Cristina Gilbert, Jon Cassir, Kathleen Farrar, Nigel Newton, Rebecca
McNally, Natalie Hamilton, Sonia Palmisano, Emma Hopkin, Ian Lamb,
Emma Bradshaw, Lizzy Mason, Courtney Griffin, Erica Barmash, Emily
Ritter, Grace Whooley, Eshani Agrawal, Nick Thomas, Alice Grigg, Elise
Burns, Jenny Collins, Linette Kim, Beth Eller, Diane Aronson, Emily
Klopfer, Melissa Kavonic, Donna Mark, John Candell, Nicholas Church,
Adiba Oemar, Hermione Lawton, Kelly de Groot, and the entire foreign
rights team—it’s an honor to know and work with you. Thank you for
making my dreams come true. To Cassie Homer: Thank you for everything.
You are an absolute delight.
To my family (especially my parents): I love you to the moon and back.
To Louisse Ang, Nicola Wilksinson, Elena Yip, Sasha Alsberg, Vilma
Gonzalez, Damaris Cardinali, Alexa Santiago, Rachel Domingo, Jamie
Miller, Alice Fanchiang, and the Maas Thirteen: your generosity, friendship,
and support mean the world to me.
And, lastly, to my readers: You guys are the greatest. The actual greatest.
None of this would have been possible without you. Thank you from the
very bottom of my heart for all that you do for me and my books.
HEARTS HAVE BEEN HEALED.
POWER GAMES HAVE BEGUN.
WAR IS UPON THEM.
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
It is a testament to the grace, faith, and aplomb of my editor, Sarah
Cantin, that when I told her I wanted to do something completely
different that hinged on the reader believing a woman had been
married seven times, she said, “Go for it.” Within the safety of that
trust, I felt free to create Evelyn Hugo. Sarah, it is with my most
sincere thanks that I acknowledge how lucky I am to have you as my
editor.
Big, big thanks must also go to Carly Watters for all that she has
done for my career. I feel fortunate to continue working with you on so
many books together.
To my incomparable rep team: You all are so good at your jobs and
seem to do them with such passion that I feel as if I’m armed at all
sides. Theresa Park, thank you for coming aboard and hitting the
ground running with a strength and elegance that is truly unmatched.
With you at the helm, I feel incredibly confident I can reach new
heights. Brad Mendelsohn, thank you for running the show with such
a strong belief in me and for dealing with the intricate details of my
neurosis with such warmth. Sylvie Rabineau and Jill Gillett, your
intelligence and skill are perhaps only outshone by your compassion.
To Ashley Kruythoff, Krista Shipp, Abigail Koons, Andrea Mai,
Emily Sweet, Alex Greene, Blair Wilson, Vanessa Martinez, and
everyone else at WME, Circle of Confusion, and Park Literary &
Media, I am honestly overwhelmed at how seamlessly you all
consistently deliver excellence. Special thanks for Vanessa para el
español. Me salvaste la vida.
To Judith, Peter, Tory, Hillary, Albert, and everyone else at Atria
who works to help my books make their way in the world, I thank you
deeply.
To Crystal, Janay, Robert, and the rest of the BookSparks team, you
are unstoppable, brilliant publicity machines and wonderful humans.
One thousand prayer hands emojis to you and all that you do.
To all the friends who have shown up time and time again, to hear
me read, to buy my books, to recommend my work to other people,
and to surreptitiously put my books at the front of the store, I am
forever grateful. To Kate, Courtney, Julia, and Monique, thank you for
helping me write about people different from myself. It is a tall order
that I take on humbly and it helps so much to have you by my side.
To the book bloggers who write and tweet and snap photos all in the
effort of telling people about my work, you are the reason I can
continue to do what I do. And I have to give it up to Natasha Minoso
and Vilma Gonzalez for just straight killin’ it.
To the Reid and Hanes families, thank you for supporting me, for
cheering the loudest, and for always being there when I need you.
To my mother, Mindy, thank you for being proud of this book and
always so eager to read anything I write.
To my brother, Jake, thank you for seeing me the way I want to be
seen, for understanding what I’m trying to do at such a deep level, and
for keeping me sane.
To the one and only Alex Jenkins Reid: Thank you for
understanding why this book was so important to me and for being so
into it. But more important, thank you for being the kind of man who
encourages me to shout louder, dream bigger, and take less shit.
Thank you for never making me feel as if I should make myself smaller
to make anyone else feel better. It brings me an absolutely
unparalleled amount of pride and joy to know that our daughter is
growing up with a father who will stick by her side no matter who she
is, who will show her how she should expect to be treated by modeling
it for her. Evelyn did not have that. I did not have that. But she will.
Because of you.
And lastly, to my baby girl. You were teeny teeny tiny—I believe the
size of half the period on the end of this sentence—when I started
writing this book. And when I finished it, you were mere days away
from making your entrance. You were with me every step of the way. I
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This book is the fruit of thirty years of trying to understand how people deal
with, survive, and heal from traumatic experiences. Thirty years of clinical
work with traumatized men, women and children; innumerable discussions
with colleagues and students, and participation in the evolving science
about how mind, brain, and body deal with, and recover from,
overwhelming experiences.
Let me start with the people who helped me organize, and eventually
publish, this book. Toni Burbank, my editor, with whom I communicated
many times each week over a two-year period about the scope,
organization, and specific contents of the book. Toni truly understood what
this book is about, and that understanding has been critical in defining its
form and substance. My agent, Brettne Bloom, understood the importance
of this work, found a home for it with Viking, and provided critical support
at critical moments. Rick Kot, my editor at Viking, supplied invaluable
feedback and editorial guidance.
My colleagues and students at the Trauma Center have provided the
feeding ground, laboratory, and support system for this work. They also
have been constant reminders of the sober reality of our work for these
three decades. I cannot name them all, but Joseph Spinazzola, Margaret
Blaustein, Roslin Moore, Richard Jacobs, Liz Warner, Wendy D’Andrea,
Jim Hopper, Fran Grossman, Alex Cook, Marla Zucker, Kevin Becker,
David Emerson, Steve Gross, Dana Moore, Robert Macy, Liz Rice-Smith,
Patty Levin, Nina Murray, Mark Gapen, Carrie Pekor, Debbie Korn, and
Betta de Boer van der Kolk all have been critical collaborators. And of
course Andy Pond and Susan Wayne of the Justice Resource Institute.
My most important companions and guides in understanding and
researching traumatic stress have been Alexander McFarlane, Onno van der
Hart, Ruth Lanius and Paul Frewen, Rachel Yehuda, Stephen Porges, Glenn
Saxe, Jaak Panksepp, Janet Osterman, Julian Ford, Brad Stolback, Frank
Putnam, Bruce Perry, Judith Herman, Robert Pynoos, Berthold Gersons,
Ellert Nijenhuis, Annette Streeck-Fisher, Marylene Cloitre, Dan Siegel, Eli
Newberger, Vincent Felitti, Robert Anda, and Martin Teicher; as well as my
colleagues who taught me about attachment: Edward Tronick, Karlen
Lyons-Ruth, and Beatrice Beebe.
Peter Levine, Pat Ogden, and Al Pesso read my paper on the
importance of the body in traumatic stress back in 1994 and then offered to
teach me about the body. I am still learning from them, and that learning
has since then been expanded by yoga and meditation teachers Stephen
Cope, Jon Kabat-Zinn, and Jack Kornfield.
Sebern Fisher first taught me about neurofeedback. Ed Hamlin and
Larry Hirshberg later expanded that understanding. Richard Schwartz
taught me internal family systems (IFS) therapy and assisted in helping to
write the chapter on IFS. Kippy Dewey and Cissa Campion introduced me
to theater, Tina Packer tried to teach me how to do it, and Andrew
Borthwick- Leslie provided critical details.
Adam Cummings, Amy Sullivan, and Susan Miller provided
indispensible support, without which many projects in this book could
never have been accomplished.
Licia Sky created the environment that allowed me to concentrate on
writing this book; she provided invaluable feedback on each one of the
chapters; she donated her artistic gifts to many illustrations; and she
contributed to sections on body awareness and clinical case material. My
trusty secretary, Angela Lin, took care of multiple crises and kept the ship
running at full speed. Ed and Edith Schonberg often provided a shelter from
the storm; Barry and Lorrie Goldensohn served as literary critics and
inspiration; and my children, Hana and Nicholas, showed me that every
new generation lives in a world that is radically different from the previous
one, and that each life is unique—a creative act by its owner that defies
explanation by genetics, environment, or culture alone.
Finally, my patients, to whom I dedicate this book—I wish I could
mention you all by name—who taught me almost everything I know—
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Thank you to everyone for reading Bridget and Rhys’s story! This
couple has consumed me for months, and now that they’re finally
out in the world, I hope you love them as much as I do!
I especially want to thank the people who’ve helped make this book
a reality:
To my alpha and beta readers Brittney, Brittany (with an a), Yaneli,
Sarah, Rebecca, Aishah, and Allisyn for your constructive feedback.
You helped make the story shine, and I am so grateful for your hon-
esty and attention to detail.
To my PA Amber for keeping me sane and always being there when
I need a second opinion. What would I do without you?
To my editor Amy Briggs and proofreader Krista Burdine for work-
ing with me on my ever-changing and sometimes tight deadlines.
You are rockstars!
To Quirah at Temptation Creations for the amazing cover and the
teams at Give Me Books and Wildfire Marketing for making release
day a dream.
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
If you follow me on Instagram, you thought this book was going to be written in
emojis, didn’t you?
Thank you to the team who worked so hard to help me bring my memoir
into the world, including: Cade Hudson; Mathew Rosengart; Cait Hoyt; my
collaborators (you know who you are); and Jennifer Bergstrom, Lauren Spiegel,
and everyone at Gallery Books.
Thank you to my fans: You have my heart and my gratitude forever. This
book is for you.
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Acknowledgments
This book began as an ode to Sy Friend, the retired director of The Variety
Club Camp for Handicapped Children in Worcester, Pa. Like many works
of fiction, it morphed into something else. I worked at the camp for four
summers when I was a student at Oberlin College. That was more than forty
years ago, but Sy’s lessons of inclusivity, love, and acceptance—delivered
not with condescending kindness but with deeds that showed the recipients
the path to true equality—remained with me for the rest of my life. In that
spirit, I am thankful to the entire Variety Club family: the late Leo and Vera
Posel, who donated the land for the camp in the thirties; the late camp
trustee Bill Saltzman, who insisted I become a counselor when I applied for
a job as a dishwasher at age nineteen; my friend and former co-counselor
Vinny Carissimi, who later became a brilliant, two-fisted Philadelphia
attorney who dug me and many former camp staffers out of several horrible
legal scrapes, usually for free. And of course Sy and his husband, Bob
Arch, now living in retirement in Lake Worth, Fla. Sy served that camp
from age sixteen until his retirement three decades later (1950–1979). I’ve
never met a more brilliant, compassionate person. He was a slender,
handsome man, a fast-moving object who slipped around the campgrounds
like a spirit, in clean white tennis shoes, shorts, and golf shirt, bearing an
ever-present cigarette between his fingers and the melody of some
spellbinding opera in his head, for he loved that genre. He knew the name
of every camper and often the names of their parents as well. He was
decades ahead of his time. His staff looked like the United Nations, long
before the word “diversity” echoed around America. We were all poorly
paid and overworked. But the lessons we learned from Sy left us rich. Many
of the former staffers went on to excel in various fields.
The kids loved him with an extraordinary intensity. Each night at
bedtime, he played a scratched recording of a bugle performing taps on the
camp’s ancient loudspeaker, followed by a gentle “Good night boys and
girls.” And if you stood outside facing the rows of cabins, which were not
air-conditioned—he refused to let the trustees install air-conditioning,
saying, “They need to feel the air. Let them live. They’re inside all year”—
you could almost hear the murmurs of all ninety-one campers, the children
lying in their bunks, the words echoing up and down the row of dark cabins,
“Good night Uncle Sy.”
He served as a principal in the Philadelphia school district during the
year, but was a summertime legend to the children of the camp. One of my
campers, Lamont Garland, now fifty-five, a born-and-raised North Philly
kid who never allowed a lifelong dependency on crutches brought on by
what was then called cerebral palsy to stop him working for the
Philadelphia Electric Company for twenty-five years before his retirement
in 2014, told me a story about Sy years ago that I never forgot. Lamont,
who today lives in Columbia, S.C., told me this story when he was seven or
eight. He was attending the Widener Memorial School in Philadelphia at the
time, which has admirably educated Philadelphia’s children with disabilities
for the last 116 years. We were sitting on the porch of one of the camp
cabins on a summer afternoon and he said, out of the blue, “Uncle Sy came
to Widener once.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
“Did he work there?”
“No. He just showed up. We were in assembly in the auditorium one
morning, and he just walked in.”
“What happened?”
“We gave him a standing ovation.”
I leave it to you, dear reader, to picture that crowded auditorium more
than forty-five years ago, the conglomerate of crutches, wheelchairs, and
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… me like my landlord![/quote]
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Spanish Inquisition![/spoiler]
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