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Chapter
Chapter 33
Chapter 33 was a turning point, one that unfolded with a precision only possible in Hollywood. For over two years, Rex and I maintained the illusion of marriage, living in a lavish home in the hills, starring in films together, and playing the roles our careers demanded. Our lives were structured like a well-rehearsed performance—separate morning routines, shared car rides to the set, and carefully choreographed public appearances. The cameras flashed as we held hands upon arrival, playing the part of…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 32
Chapter 32 The night of the academy awards, Rex and I sat next to each other, holding hands, allowing everyone a glimpse of the romantic marriage we were peddling around town. We both smiled politely when we lost, clapping for the winners. I was disappointed but not surprised. It seemed a little too good to be true, the idea of Oscars for people like Rex and me, beautiful movie stars trying to prove they had substance. I got the distinct impression that a lot of people wanted us to stay in our lane. So we…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 31
Chapter 31 There is a certain freedom in marrying a man when you aren’t hiding anything. Celia was gone. I wasn’t really at a place in my life where I could fall in love with anyone, and Rex wasn’t the type of man who seemed capable of falling in love at all. Maybe, if we’d met at different times in our lives, we might have hit it off. But with things as they were, Rex and I had a relationship built entirely on box office.It was tacky and fake and manipulative.But it was the beginning of my…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 30
Chapter 30 “You and Celia didn't have any contact at all?” I ask. Evelyn shakes her head. She stands up and walks over to the window and opens it a crack. The breeze that streams in is welcome. When she sits back down, she looks at me, ready to move on to something else. But I’m too baffled. “How long were the two of you together by that point?” “Three years?” Evelyn says. “Just about.” “And she just left? Without another word?” Evelyn nods. “Did you try to call her?” She…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 29
Chapter 29 For two months, I was living in near bliss. Celia and I never talked about Mick, because we didn’t have to. Instead, we could go wherever we wanted, do whatever we wanted.Celia bought a second car, a boring brown sedan, and left it parked in my driveway every night without anyone asking questions. We would sleep cradling each other, turning off the light an hour before we wanted to fall asleep so that we could talk in the darkness. I would trace the lines of her palm with my fingertips in the…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 28
Chapter 28 I wore a cream-colored cocktail dress with heavy gold beading and a plunging neckline. I pulled my long blond hair into a high ponytail. I wore diamond earrings.I glowed. The first thing you need to do to get a man to elope with you is to challenge him to go to Las Vegas.You do this by being out at an L.A. club and having a few drinks together. You ignore the impulse to roll your eyes at how eager he is to have his picture taken with you. You recognize that everyone is playing everyone else.…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 27
Chapter 27 "I'm going out on a date with Mick Riva.”“Like hell you are.”When Celia was angry, her chest and her cheeks flushed. This time, they’d grown red faster than I’d ever seen.We were in the outdoor kitchen of her weekend home in Palm Springs. She was grilling us burgers for dinner.Ever since the article came out, I’d refused to be seen with her in Los Angeles. The rags didn’t yet know about her place in Palm Springs. So we would spend weekends there together and our weeks in L.A.…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 26
Chapter 26 I was sent an invitation to see Mick Riva perform at the Hollywood Bowl that fall. I decided to go, not because I cared about seeing Mick Riva but because an evening outside sounded fun. And I wasn’t above courting the tabloids.Celia, Harry, and I decided to go together. I would never have gone with just Celia, not with that many eyes on us. But Harry was a perfect buffer.That night, the air in L.A. was cooler than I had anticipated. I was wearing capri pants and a short-sleeved sweater. I…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 25
Chapter 25 Celia was shooting a movie on location in Big Bear for three weeks. I knew that going with her wasn’t an option, nor was visiting her on the set. She insisted she would come home every weekend, but it felt too risky.She was a single girl, after all. I was afraid the prevailing wisdom erred too close to the question What do single girls have to go home to?So I decided it was the right time to go to France.Harry had some connections to filmmakers in Paris. He made a few calls on the sly for…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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Chapter 24
Chapter 24 Ari dropped me from any productions within Sunset and started offering to loan me out to Columbia. After being forced to do two forgettable romantic comedies—both of them so bad that it was a foregone conclusion they would fail spectacularly—the other studios didn’t want much of me, either.Don was on the cover of Life, gracefully coming out of the ocean onto the shore, smiling as if it was the best day of his life.When the 1960 Academy Awards came around, I was officially persona non…-
385.7 K • Ongoing
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