Chap­ter 4 opens with the pro­tag­o­nist, Mick­ey, reflect­ing on the unset­tling sit­u­a­tion that has led him to a dis­as­sem­bler field inter­face, a device that threat­ens to reduce him to a slur­ry for the colonists of Nifl­heim. In the face of this life-threat­en­ing real­i­ty, Mick­ey grap­ples with the weight of regret over past deci­sions, par­tic­u­lar­ly those sur­round­ing his ini­tial choic­es involv­ing Gwen Johansen. This moment of despair prompts a series of reflec­tions on the series of events that pushed him toward his cur­rent predica­ment. He recalls his time on Kiruna, a place where he had been stuck, both emo­tion­al­ly and finan­cial­ly, and how the loom­ing pres­ence of Dar­ius Blank had made every day feel like a strug­gle for sur­vival. Mickey’s thoughts nat­u­ral­ly turn to his past friend­ship with Berto, a rela­tion­ship that had begun in their school days and which had defined much of Mick­ey’s life. Their bond had been root­ed in a shared pas­sion for flight sim­u­la­tors, with Berto quick­ly excelling in all areas. Though Mick­ey had always admired Berto’s skill and achieve­ments, it was Berto’s suc­cess in pog-ball that tru­ly pro­pelled him to fame. Yet, years lat­er, Berto’s attempt to revive his career, unknow­ing­ly, placed Mick­ey in a finan­cial cri­sis that would have last­ing con­se­quences.

Mick­ey recounts how he had placed a bet on Berto’s inevitable fail­ure, despite his warn­ings to Berto that the come­back attempt would like­ly be unsuc­cess­ful. This bet, born from a mix­ture of doubt and mis­guid­ed hope, spi­raled out of con­trol, and Mick­ey found him­self over­whelmed by debt. This finan­cial strain drew the atten­tion of Dar­ius Blank, a fig­ure whose rep­u­ta­tion for ruth­less­ness made him a con­stant source of fear. Mick­ey had tried to con­vince him­self that Blank’s threats were mere pos­tur­ing, that he wouldn’t go as far as to take his life over mon­ey. How­ev­er, this illu­sion was shat­tered when a thug, sent by Blank, con­front­ed Mick­ey, using a neur­al induc­er to tor­ture him in an effort to break him. This trau­mat­ic encounter marked a turn­ing point for Mick­ey, forc­ing him to con­front the real­i­ty of his sit­u­a­tion: his life was at risk, and with­out a way out, sur­vival seemed impos­si­ble. The fear of Blank’s grow­ing influ­ence and the bru­tal con­se­quences of his debts left Mick­ey with lit­tle choice but to search for a way to escape.

In a des­per­ate attempt to escape his dire cir­cum­stances, Mick­ey set his sights on a posi­tion aboard the Drakkar, hop­ing that join­ing the crew could pro­vide the fresh start he so des­per­ate­ly need­ed. How­ev­er, when Mick­ey dis­cov­ered that the only avail­able posi­tion was that of an “Expend­able,” the real­i­ty of the sit­u­a­tion hit him hard. The Expend­able role was inher­ent­ly dan­ger­ous, reserved for indi­vid­u­als who would car­ry out the most haz­ardous tasks, often at the cost of their lives. Mick­ey had no qual­i­fi­ca­tions for oth­er roles, and with no oth­er viable option, he reluc­tant­ly accept­ed the posi­tion. Even though Berto expressed con­cern for his safe­ty, he ulti­mate­ly left the deci­sion up to Mick­ey. The choice, though fraught with dan­ger, seemed to be the only escape from his cur­rent life. As Mick­ey pre­pared for the inter­view, he could­n’t shake the sense of res­ig­na­tion that filled him. The fear of death, which had been instilled in him by his tor­ture at the hands of Blank’s thug, seemed inevitable, but at least it was a way out of the crush­ing despair he had been liv­ing in. This deci­sion set Mick­ey on a path that was uncer­tain and full of risk, but it also pro­vid­ed a glim­mer of hope, a chance to break free from the cycle of debt and fear that had defined his life for so long.

As the chap­ter pro­gress­es, Mick­ey reflects deeply on the choic­es that led him here, acknowl­edg­ing that his deci­sion to become an Expend­able was not dri­ven by desire but by neces­si­ty. His past had closed off all oth­er options, and while the dan­gers of his new role were unde­ni­able, it seemed to be his only way to escape the crush­ing weight of his debts and the threats that loomed over him. Mick­ey real­izes that his sur­vival on the Drakkar will depend on more than just his abil­i­ty to avoid death; it will require him to rec­on­cile with his own sense of pur­pose and the grim real­i­ty of what he has become. The Expend­able role, though a poten­tial death sen­tence, also rep­re­sents a final chance at free­dom from the life he had been shack­led to on Midgard. Mickey’s jour­ney into the unknown is not just about phys­i­cal sur­vival, but about grap­pling with the exis­ten­tial ques­tions of iden­ti­ty, worth, and the sac­ri­fices one is will­ing to make to escape a life of des­per­a­tion. This chap­ter sets the stage for Mickey’s con­tin­ued strug­gle for sur­vival, where the bound­aries between hope and despair are con­stant­ly shift­ing, and the ulti­mate ques­tion of whether he can escape his past and rede­fine his future remains unan­swered.